


oh, there is thunder in our hearts

by gongji



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: M/M, Modern Era, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Lives, Reincarnation, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:08:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 28,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27274681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gongji/pseuds/gongji
Summary: Stray, uneven strands hang from his scalp, like a veil made of anger and grief. Rage. Sadness. Dark hair litters the sink —hishair.Felix grips the edge of the sink, grip trembling, breaths heavy. Lightning dances in his eyes.This is a dream. It has to be.Felix jolts awake. All he remembers from the dream is his voice echoing in his head.Never again, boar. Never again.Felix is a college student just trying to enjoy his summer break with his childhood friends Ingrid and Sylvain when a seemingly fated meeting with a seemingly familiar stranger whisks him away on a whirlwind summer romance. As Felix struggles with his feelings, he begins to realize he may be falling for the man he betrayed and killed - and maybe loved - in a past life.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 10
Kudos: 42
Collections: Dimilix Big Bang





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> At long last, my labor of love. Thank you so much for my Dimilix friends for your wonderful support as this fic took me through the five stages of grief and love LOL. 
> 
> This fic would not be possible without my amazing artist, [ Takeshi](https://twitter.com/foxkunkun), who really brought this fic to life with her gorgeous art. Thank you so much for all your wonderful ideas and for working with me!
> 
> Thank you as well to my wonderful friends [Valdasine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valdasine) and [ Ethereally](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ethereally) for beta-ing and keeping my spirits up when I desperately needed the encouragement.
> 
> Last but not least, thank you so much to the Dimilix Big Bang mods, who were so helpful and patient through this long process. 
> 
> Happy Dimilix!

There are worse ways to spend his day.

It’s Sylvain, Ingrid, and Felix’s first summer together after their first year of university: their separation was the first time they’d spent so long apart. Ingrid dazzled her family with her acceptance at Deirdru Law and moved across the country to follow her passion. Sylvain decided he’d take an offer at Garreg Mach University and moved out of Faerghus without a moment’s hesitation. Good for them, Felix supposes. Felix opted to stay behind to attend a local university in Fhirdiad, quietly missing his friends, and never telling them unless they fought it out of him.

They’ve been back for a week. It’s Sylvain’s turn to choose their plans, and he decides on the Fhirdiad Art Museum out of literally any other choice.

“Why,” Felix begins, and his friends already know what he’s going to ask before he even opens his mouth, “are we here?”

“You don’t like a little culture?” Sylvain teases, wagging his eyebrows. “Plus, come on, Ingrid chose that Renaissance Fair and you wanted the arcade, so I figured we’d have some relaxing educational quiet time this week.”

“I think it’s nice to have a change of pace,” Ingrid says, hands on the back of Felix’s shoulders. She’s ready to push him into the weathered building. “Let’s go learn about art!”

And that’s how Felix ends up standing in front of the largest painting displayed in the museum. The canvas stretches across an entire wall, lit dramatically under tiny lamps. The Battle of Gronder Field, 1185, oil on canvas, by Ignatz Victor. It’s certainly a sight to see — bloodied soldiers and horses charging to their deaths, their valiant leaders clashing in a three-way battle that, if Felix recalls correctly, ended in a pyrrhic victory. 

“Hmph,” Felix huffs out loud. No one’s close enough to hear. “What a load of horseshit.”

“Why do you say that?” 

He was wrong.

Felix nearly jumps at the deep voice. He whirls around; a tall blond stands behind him, blue eyes searching with open curiosity.

“Is it your business to question strangers on their opinions?” Felix huffs, crossing his arms and turning away.

“Not at all. I’m sorry,” the man responds, his eyebrows furrowing and looking genuinely apologetic as he crosses and uncrosses his arms awkwardly. “Y- you seemed to be visibly upset by this, so I thought perhaps I should ask.”

“Ugh.” Felix supposes this guy is _someone_ to talk to. “I hate chivalry. Such a romanticized burden deserves to stay dead. Look at how it led all of these soldiers to their grave. We’re better off not remembering how society lived by its stupid rules.”

“I’m not certain about that,” the man says. “It may be an outdated concept, but I think it’s very noble. Might I politely disagree? I don’t believe chivalry led these soldiers astray — in fact, I would propose the idea of chivalry is what gave these armies the morale to fight for what they believed in.”

Felix rolls his eyes, though he knows the man can’t see. He has better things to do than argue with strangers. Even handsome ones.

Still, he turns back around to face him.

“Besides,” the man straightens his posture, a faint smile gracing his features as though he’s honoring royalty instead of a painting. “I believe this is Loog.”

_Don’t engage him, Felix, don’t do it. Don’t say anything._

“ _Loog_?” 

Felix almost smacks himself for opening his mouth. But it’s open and he’s talking, so he might as well share his thoughts, since he _clearly_ can’t keep them to himself today. “That old kid’s story? Who would paint such an elaborate painting based on some old fable?”

“It’s not a kid’s story. It’s quite an important legend in Faerghus, isn’t it?” 

Felix crosses his arms and leans his weight on one leg. “And I heard it to death as a kid. It’s just a useless fable about knights and lords.”

“Ah,” The man hums for a moment and, with a smile — as if he knew what would make Felix feel better in that moment — says, “I suppose I always did like Kyphon better.” 

It does, but only marginally, because Felix scoffs gutturally all the way to the back of his throat. 

“Kyphon? Kyphon was even worse. He dedicated his entire life to chivalry and was immortalized for it.”

“But he was celebrated for how honorable he was, how dutiful he was.” Can this guy not take a hint? “I think we can all learn a thing or two about it and apply it to our daily lives.”

“What, responsibility? Are you turning this into some lecture about how we need to be _better about our relationships_ with each other and whatever, and—” Felix stops. 

He’s talking too much. 

Why is he talking so much?

“Not at all,” the stranger says, tilting his head like he’s amused. “Just sharing an observation.”

“Ha!” Felix scoffs again, though less harshly. “Nobility and chivalry can kiss my ass.”

The man blinks at him and parts his lips like maybe he wants to keep talking, maybe he’s thinking about a response, but he’s interrupted by a voice from behind.

“Dimitri! There you are.” A taller man marches towards them — light hair, dark skin, handsome— Felix has to stop himself after that thought pops into his mind before he starts listing all their attractive features. “I’ve been looking for you. I turned around to look at a painting and when I turned back you were gone.”

“Oh, sorry Dedue.” The blond man — Dimitri, apparently— greets his friend with a smile. “I caught sight of Gronder Field and felt incredibly drawn towards it. I guess I didn’t realize…” he trails off, noticing Felix through the corner of his eye. “Oh! And then I met… um.”

Felix knows he’s about to ask for his name. He’s not sharing it.

“No.” 

“...And we had a wonderful conversation.” Dimitri continues without missing a beat. “About chivalry, in fact!”

“Oh, that’s… nice?” Dedue steps forward and extends a hand, waiting for a handshake. “Nice to meet you, I’m Dedue.”

“Ah! I haven’t introduced myself either!” Dimitri says, and also extends a hand towards Felix. “My name is Dimitri, it’s a pleasure.” 

Now Felix has two people extending their hands to him and waiting for handshakes like a damn business meeting, or a comedy show, and he turns away instead, opting to shake neither of their hands as if that’s his only other option.

“Great. Are we done here?”

“Oh, I… suppose.” Crushing sadness sours Dimitri’s tone, and although Felix isn’t looking at him, he feels like he knows exactly what kind of sad, kicked puppy expression he’s making. 

Which feels… odd. They just met.

“Anyway, I’m getting out of here—” Felix begins.

Sylvain’s voice rings out to his horror.

“Felix! Hey!” Goddess damn it, so much for keeping his name a secret to strangers. “Why’d you run off?”

“Ugh, Sylvain,” Felix groans. “You were trying to hit on random girls. I don’t know where Ingrid went.” 

He frowns. Now all of their names are out in the open and Dimitri has heard them all. Felix looks back over his shoulder, hoping Dimitri and Dedue have moved on, but they haven’t — they’re right there smiling at Sylvain like they’re about to initiate a conversation.

“Aw man, thanks for looking out for little Felix, kind sirs,” Sylvain winks at Dimitri and Dedue, clapping Felix on the shoulder. “You know how kids are, always running off, am I right?”

“Fuck you, Sylvain,” is all Felix cares to say. But then he changes his mind and, after a pause, adds, “You’re the ones who lost _me_.” 

Dimitri chuckles. Felix doesn’t know why; it wasn’t particularly meant to be funny. But something about his laugh softens Felix enough that he uncrosses his arms. It makes him feel strangely warm inside — like a comforting fire, a familiar hearth.

That, of course, changes when he turns to face Dimitri and Dedue. Sylvain slinks an arm around his shoulders. Felix scowls. “Sylvain, get off me.”

“And lose you again? Never,” Sylvain teases. “Introduce me to your new friends.”

“They’re not my friends.”

“I’m Dimitri,” Dimitri says anyway, like a friend. “And this is Dedue. We were just admiring the art, we didn’t mean to bother, ah, Felix, was it?”

Ugh, the handsome strangers definitely know his name now.

“It’s nice to meet you!” Sylvain takes Dimitri’s extended hand. “I’m Sylvain.” He does the same with Dedue, shaking both their hands at the same time in a strange, comical motion. He gestures to Felix when he lets go. “And this is Felix. He’s also happy to meet you.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“And I’m Ingrid.” 

Her voice calls out from behind Sylvain as she steps into the room. “Sorry, finally found you two and overheard introductions. What’s going on?” 

“Oh, we’re meeting Felix’s new friends!” Sylvain flashes a charming smile. Felix frowns.

“They are _not_ my friends.”

“Dimitri, Dedue, meet Ingrid. Ingrid, meet Dimitri and Dedue.” Sylvain ignores Felix’s protests again. Some friend. “They were talking about how great it is to love art. Or something.”

Dimitri laughs. “Actually, our conversation was quite fascinating.”

Felix scoffs, trying to change the subject before everyone was talking about it. “It doesn’t matter.”

Dimitri has somehow managed to master Sylvain’s skill of bypassing Felix’s protests within minutes of meeting him. “We were discussing the historical importance of chivalry, as depicted in this painting of Gronder Field. What do you think?”

Ingrid says, “I think that’s quite a noble concept,” and Sylvain says, “Doesn’t matter to me.” at the same time. They look at each other. Dimitri smiles again.

“It seems we have quite the mixed crowd in here tonight.”

“Funny we’d all meet like this,” Dedue says. “Interesting opinions.”

Dimitri playfully taps him on the arm. “Oh, are you tired of hearing my commentary already?”

“No, of course not,” Dedue responds. “It’s interesting to hear what other people think too.”

Sylvain holds up his hands like he’s surrendering. “Hey, I don’t know a single thing, my dude.” 

“Sylvain you liar, history was your favorite subject in high school where we learned _all about this_.” Ingrid crosses her arms, but then uncrosses them — she won’t continue chastising her friends in front of company.

“Psht, whatever,” Felix finally pipes up from where he sulked in the corner. “Not like any of these people existed anyway.”

“You don’t think Loog and Kyphon existed?” Dimitri asks, which has Sylvain howling.

“Loog and Kyphon! Oh _man_ , have you asked Felix about his opinions on them yet?” Sylvain says excitedly. “Because he—”

“Sylvain!” Felix’s protests grow desperate now Sylvain’s ready to divulge classified information.

“He wanted to be Kyphon when we were kids!” Sylvain laughs. “And it was so cute, he was so excited and—”

“I am going to kill you.” Felix pinches Sylvain’s arm, which gets Sylvain to stop talking but not stop laughing. 

“That sounds just like me,” Dimitri returns a laugh. “I wanted to be like Loog when I was a child. He was quite the role model for me growing up, actually.”

“Pah,” Felix gripes. “This is a waste of time. Let’s go home.”

“But we haven’t made it to the sword exhibit,” Ingrid says, knowing she’s gotten Felix’s attention when he perks up.

“...We go to the sword exhibit. And then home.”

“We were just there,” Dedue says. “It’s in the other room.” He pauses. “Well, I was just there, at least. I don’t think Dimitri’s been there yet. I lost him a few rooms over.” 

Dimitri only scratches his head in response to his friend’s teasing.

“I haven’t. But don’t worry about that, we’ll make it over there later. I don’t want to bother Felix if he’d like to make his escape.” His smile is charming. Felix hates it — or at least, that’s what he wants to think. In reality, it’s so charming Felix _can’t_ hate it, and that’s what makes him hate it even more. 

“Why don’t you come with us?” Ingrid smiles invitingly. “I’m sure Felix doesn’t mind. Plus, I’m interested in the conversation you were having. I didn’t get to hear it.”

“Ingrid was really into knights and horses growing up,” Sylvain explains. “I guess she still is, right? Ask her about her ponysona.”

“I do _not_ have a fursona, thank you very much!” Ingrid snaps. “Not that it would be a bad thing if I did, mind you! I have a genuine interest in the history of Faerghus. The history of all of Fodlan, in fact.”

Sylvain leans over to Dimitri and whispers, “She absolutely has a fursona.”

“I think that’s very creative,” Dimitri responds encouragingly. “I don’t know much about that but if I had to envision myself as an animal, I imagine I’d choose a lion.”

“More like a boar,” Felix offers, and then stops. “...Sorry,” he says gruffly, but genuinely apologetic. “I don’t know why I said that.” 

That was odd. That came to him so quickly and organically. Why _did_ he say that?

“Felix would be a cat,” Sylvain continues.

“I would not!”

Ingrid nods her head in agreement. “He would.” 

“I would not— forget it.” Felix throws his hands in the air in defeat. “I’m done. Let’s look at the swords.” 

“Okay, okay.” Sylvain turns to Dimitri and Dedue. “You guys wanna come along?”

Before Felix can string in another “Absolutely not!” Dimitri shakes his head. “I’d say yes but I think we’ve exhausted Felix already. Besides,” he straightens. “I was told there was a secret gelato cafe in the basement, and I want to find it.”

“Oh! Take the elevator down this hallway, it’s the only one with access to the underground escalator.” Ingrid points to the elevator down the hall. “The Zanado treasure fruit flavor is really good, but you really can’t go wrong with the gelato here.”

“That sounds delightful, thank you, Ingrid!” Dimitri smiles softly and turns to Dedue. “Shall we?”

“Oh! Wait,” Sylvain pulls out his phone. “Are you guys on social media?”

“We are not—” Felix begins, and is once again interrupted. 

“I’m not on too much…” Dimitri pulls his phone from his pants pocket. “Mostly Facebook just to keep in touch with family and a few old friends.” He pulls up his profile and shows Sylvain, who types in his name in the search bar until the right profile pops up. 

“Aaaand added, _Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd_ ,” Sylvain says dramatically, “You’ve got such a powerful-sounding name. I wouldn’t be surprised if you told me you were secretly a crown prince from a foreign land or something.” He pauses and looks up at him, waggling his eyebrows. “Are you?”

“Ha!” Dimitri laughs, louder this time. “No, nothing like that. My family does come from an old line of royalty, however. But nothing that’s lasted this long.” He checks his phone to accept his new friend request. “Sylvain Gautier… Gautier, that’s an old family name, too.”

“Yeah, my folks come from old money.” Sylvain rests a hand on his hip. “Probably blew through most of the family fortune over the years. I can’t imagine anyone in this family in any kind of position of power. Yours truly included.” He winks. 

“You know, I think there was a King Dimitri of Faerghus at one point,” Ingrid says while adding Dimitri. Felix has given up.

“Yes, I was told I was named after him,” Dimitri says, accepting her request. “Though it’s really debatable whether or not he actually existed.” He glances up. “Galatea sounds familiar, but I can’t quite place it.”

“It’s an old name from Faerghus too, but from money like Gautier,” she says. “I did some research on it a few years back, though I can’t remember the origin. My dad was really interested in our family history at one point, so I just read whatever he found.”

“And you, my lovely new friend,” Sylvain steps over to get Dedue’s information. “How can I look you up?”

“Try Dedue Molinaro.”

“Molinaro, Molinaro~” Sylvain singsongs as he types. “I like that name, it’s got such a nice ring to it, like it just rolls off the tongue. This you?” He lifts his phone to show Dedue the profile he found, and Dedue nods.

“From Duscur!” Ingrid shares as she pulls up his profile for herself. “Do you still live there now?”

“Yes, I’m visiting Fhirdiad for summer break,” he explains, not looking up from his phone screen.

“That’s awesome, I’ve never been,” Sylvain says, nudging Felix. “Well? Gonna stay in touch with your new friends?”

“No,” comes the harsh reply. 

Sylvain sighs. “He doesn’t use Facebook very much, but look up Felix Fraldarius. You should see me and Ingrid as mutual friends on his profile.” 

Felix rolls his eyes once again. This may as well happen.

“Fraldarius!” Dimitri hums as he looks him up. “Do you know the history behind that name?”

“Only that it comes from some old Faerghus bullshit,” Felix huffs, crossing his arms. 

“The Fraldariuses actually have a long history with the Blaiddyds,” Dimitri explains, and then pauses. “Well, supposedly. I don’t know this for sure. But the Blaiddyd line is supposed to descend from kings, and the Fraldarius line is supposedly descended from their knights and right hand men.”

“Oooh~” Sylvain coos, “sounds to me like your family comes from _chivalry_.” 

“Who cares,” Felix responds, bristling. “I’m not interested in any of that. It doesn’t matter what my ancient ancestors did.”

“You know, it’s kind of funny,” Dedue says quietly. He must not have realized he said this out loud, because he looks a bit taken aback when everyone turns to look at him, eyebrows raised. “Oh, it’s nothing. Just that we’ve all met and it sounds like all of your ancestors have history.”

“Yeah?” Sylvain swings his hands behind his head and leans his weight on one leg. “Think it’s fate?”

“No such thing as fate,” Felix says.

“A happy coincidence, then,” Ingrid says, clasping her hands together. “Oh, lighten up, Felix!” she exclaims in response to the glare she gets from him. 

“We should really be going, then,” Dimitri says, waving. “It was nice meeting you all!” 

Felix shuffles his friends into the other room the second Dimitri makes moves to leave. “What the hell was that?”

“What, he’s cute!” Sylvain smiles at his friend. “If you didn’t want us to wingman for you, I thought you’d have left a while ago.”

“That is _not_ what was going on there.” Felix grits his teeth. “And even if it was, I wouldn’t need your help!” 

“Oh Felix…” Ingrid croons, “You have so much to learn…”

Felix lies in bed later that night, checking his Facebook for once. Despite normally only using it for the endless scrolling cat videos and cool martial arts techniques, Felix finds himself absentmindedly looking through the profiles of his new acquaintances (they aren’t _friends_ , they aren’t!). Dedue’s profile is modest, mostly shared posts of cooking and recipe videos, alongside some photos of Duscur scenery and tagged photos from other people.

Felix taps on Dimitri’s profile and scrolls through his profile pictures. There’s his current one, where he’s just standing around. It’s pretty boring. He’s doing the same in the next one. He’s standing around again in the third, but younger. Felix scowls, scrolling until he finds a good photo of his face, and oh no.

It wasn’t just the lighting in the museum, Dimitri really _is_ cute. 

Felix finds an ugly photo of a young Dimitri with a hairstyle that looks like spaghetti. His phone falls on his face. He calls it a night.

* * *

“Ingrid, hurry _up_ already. We’ve been waiting for too long,” Felix complains from where he sits at a table in one of their usual cafe spots. Sylvain leans back in his chair, crumbs on his mouth from where he’d scarfed down an almond croissant, and licks his fingers. 

“Yeah Ingrid, hurry up.” Sylvain mocks Felix’s tone, giving Ingrid a wink when she turns around with a frown.

“Don’t rush me, I’m waiting to get my order!” She glares at her friends. “The only reason you got that croissant before I got my order is because you flirted with the barista.” That part was true — Sylvain gave the girl a smile and a wink and suddenly he had a free croissant in his hand. 

“I mean, I tipped her for it,” he says, “y’know, gave her just the—”

“Stop,” Felix groans. “Don’t even say it.”

“Oh come on, you missed me!” Sylvain gives Felix a wink too. Felix sticks his foot under one of Sylvain’s chair’s raised, tipping it backwards. “Felix!” he yelps, catching his balance on the table. Felix grins.

“What happened?” Ingrid finally walks over, drink and snack in hand. “Do I need the spray bottle for our resident cat?”

“For the last _time,_ I am not a cat,” Felix crosses his arms, turning to look out the window behind him. Despite his actions, he really did miss Sylvain and Ingrid. Things just weren’t the same without them, and he _is_ glad they’re back for the summer.

“So, how’s school going?” Ingrid is the first to bring up the topic. “It feels weird that we’re not always together anymore.”

Sylvain rests his head on his hand and fakes a dramatic frown. “Yeah, can’t hit you up at 2am asking to copy homework anymore.”

“Like I ever answered those messages anyway.” Ingrid rolls her eyes. “But how is Garreg Mach? I didn’t think you’d be interested in moving so far away.”

“Oh, you know, located in the very center of Fódlan so I get the best of all worlds,” Sylvain replies. “I didn’t move as far as you did, though. Beautiful Ingrid spreads her wings to fly all the way to Deirdru…”

“It’s not _that_ far.”

“What are the girls like there? Any cute aspiring lawyers at Deirdru Law I should know about?” Sylvain tilts his head at Ingrid, who crinkles her nose in response.

“Maybe if you thought less about girls, you’d have figured out what you’re studying already,” she says. “Why are you still undeclared? It’s Garreg Mach University! They have everything you could ever want!” 

“Meh,” Sylvain hums, and immediately changes the subject. “Hey Felix, did you choose to stay here and go to Fhirdiad University ‘cause you can shorten it to FU?”

“Fuck you,” is the reply.

“Exactly.”

“At least Felix will graduate with a degree in _something._ ”

“Don’t drag me into this.” Felix reaches to grab his coffee cup and take a sip, mostly to give him an excuse not to talk about school life. A part of him wishes he’d moved away from home like his friends did. At least that way he wouldn’t have to listen to his father lecture him day after day about his studies and career path. His coffee is lukewarm now, bitter on his tongue. He’s tuned out Sylvain and Ingrid, but the background bickering is admittedly nice. It’s familiar, and while Felix won’t admit he’s missed them, he’s certain they’re able to figure it out one way or another.

“Hey, isn’t that Dimitri?” Sylvain’s voice brings Felix’s attention back to focus. Felix glances up, feeling an odd lightness in his chest at the sound of Dimitri’s name. “Dedue is with him too! Let’s invite them to join us.”

“I’m fine with that, they were fun,” Ingrid says, starting to make room at the table.

“No.” Felix frowns. “We are not doing that.”

“Dimitri!” Sylvain calls out with a wave before Felix can even think to stop him. “Dedue! Over here!”

“What are you doing? Don’t do that!” Felix hisses, and has half a mind to yank Sylvain’s arm back down. He almost does, but the damage has been done — Dimitri perks up when he sees the trio at the table and starts to walk over to them.

“Good to see you three again,” he says with a smile. It’s charming. Felix grits his teeth. “I trust that this cafe is good then, if you’re all here!”

“The coffee is pretty good!” Ingrid lifts up her cup to emphasize her point. “Get the almond croissants, too. They bake them fresh here and you can really taste the difference.”

“Oh, they have traditional Duscur cookies here,” Dedue pipes up, looking at the menu. “I want to see how they make them.”

“If they’re really good, let me know!” Ingrid turns to face the newcomers. “I’d love to try them, especially if they get it right.”

Dedue laughs, “I’m hoping so. In truth, they’re hard to mess up, but… it’s the technique that makes or breaks it. If they don’t knead the dough just right…” He trails off. “Oh, sorry.”

“Never apologize, man.” Sylvain says and moves his chair so they can all sit at the table. Ingrid scoots closer to Sylvain, leaving an open seat at the middle of the table, and one next to Felix. 

It’s obvious they’re making room, but Dimitri asks anyway. Infuriating. “Do you mind if we join you?” 

“The more the merrier!” Sylvain smiles, and then nudges Felix. “Right Felix?” 

Felix only groans. He can’t stop this from happening, but he isn’t going to like it. 

“I think they’re nice,” Ingrid says after Dimitri and Dedue leave to order.

“They are. All the more reason for our darling cat to chat them up a bit more.” Sylvain nudges Felix once more and receives a glare. “Don’t say we ever did nothing for you!”

“I don’t need help,” Felix says harshly. “With anything.”

“A summer romance could be fun.” Sylvain darts his gaze obviously between Felix and Dimitri, and then winks. 

“Why is that the first thing you think about?” Felix crosses his arms. “Who says I’m looking for something like that?” 

Sylvain flicks at a crumb on the table. “I think about them because they’re fun! And maybe you could use some fun.” 

“You chase after him then.” Felix leans back in his chair and crosses his legs to match his arms. “If you think they’re so great.” And Sylvain laughs.

“Maybe I will then!” He opens his mouth through a grin like he’s about to keep talking when Dimitri and Dedue return to join them. “Hey, you’re back!”

Dedue claims the free spot in the middle of the table, and Dimitri takes a seat next to Felix, sitting down awkwardly like he was waiting for Felix to hiss at him for doing so. Felix doesn’t. It doesn’t make it any less awkward.

“Small world, huh?” Sylvain breaks the awkward vibe going on between Felix and Dimitri, noticing almost instantly. “Funny we’d run into you guys here.”

“Ah, yes, well,” Dimitri begins, “we were in the area, and this cafe looked nice.”

“We were taking a walk,” Dedue continues. “I needed a break.”

“It’s nice weather for a walk,” Ingrid nods. “The good thing about Faerghus in the summer is that it doesn’t get too hot.” 

“Oh, yes, that’s why we come here in the summer!” Dimitri begins, and then pauses, as if he realized he needs to explain himself, “I, ah, I’m here for the summer with my family. I come here every year.”

“Where ya from, Dima?” Sylvain asks. “Hope you don’t mind me calling you that.”

“No, I don’t mind at all!” Dimitri smiles, looking sheepishly into his chamomile tea. “It sounds rather pleasant.” He clears his throat. “Well, I don’t live in Fodlan. I currently live in Pherae, in Lycia. But my family is originally from Faeghus. Fhirdiad, actually. We, um, we own the Blaiddyd Estate in Fhirdiad and visit every summer.”

“Whaaaaat!” Sylvain leans back in his chair again. “That giant mansion? Damn, your family is _rich_ rich! Got any siblings? Are they single?”

Dimitri chuckles, taking a sip of tea. It’s still too hot to drink, so he sets it down. “I have a stepsister named Edelgard. She and my stepmother come with us to the Blaiddyd Estate every summer, and every winter my father and I go with her to visit her family’s estate in Enbarr.”

“Enbarr like as in Adrestia? Damn, she’s rich too?” Sylvain rests his hands behind his head as he leans back. “The whole family’s loaded…You’re a rich abroad bitch!” 

“Winter in Enbarr must be a lot more tolerable than winters in Fhirdiad,” Ingrid adds, ignoring Sylvain’s teasing. “Ever since I moved to Deirdru, I’ve found I don’t really miss it.” 

“Oh, it’s quite nice! The winter holiday shows at The Mittelfrank Opera Company are quite phenomenal. If you’re ever in the area for one, I highly recommend it!”

“You mean, if we ever score a ticket to see one.” Sylvain leans forward. “Those tickets aren’t cheap!” 

Felix looks away while the group talks. There’s this heavy pit in his stomach that’s been there ever since Sylvain and Ingrid came back for summer break. He’d spent the school months waiting for break to roll around so he could see them again, but now that he has, everything feels too… different. School is out for the summer but it still lingers between them all, and now that Dimitri and Dedue are here, it’s hard for Felix to feel comfortable. He leans his elbow on the table and rests his hand on his chin. 

The conversation goes on without him. Sylvain asks, “Dedue, you said you’re from Duscur, right? How’d you two meet?”

Dedue chuckles. Dimitri’s cheeks tint slightly pink. “We met online a few years ago.”

“It’s embarrassing,” Dimitri mumbles awkwardly under his breath.

“Okay but now I _have_ to hear it,” Sylvain grins, “you know that’s how it goes.”

“Dedue, um,” Dimitri laughs again, toying with the bottom hem of his shirt like he’s feeling embarrassed. “Dedue writes… really good fanfiction.”

“He left a really, really long and detailed comment on one of my fics,” Dedue continues with a small smile on his lips. “It was really sweet, so I reached out to him and we started talking. And a few years later, here I am, visiting him in Fhirdiad.”

“Dare I ask what kind of fanfiction you write?” Sylvain looks intensely at Dedue, who takes a sip of his coffee, and then sets the mug down gently.

“You could.”

“There’s a video game we both like and... well…” Dimitri trails off. “Dedue has crafted some excellent prose about these characters, and…”

“Do they fuck?” Sylvain stares right at Dedue. He nods, calmly.

“They do.”

“It is so very steamy!” Dimitri’s voice cracks. He clears his throat. 

Felix isn’t really listening to the conversation, but the way Dimitri looks so flustered is actually kind of cute. What Felix _wants_ to do is smirk at the sight of Dimitri looking flushed, but instead his more rational thoughts catch up with him, and he realizes he’s thinking Dimitri looks _cute_. Felix feels his face get hot and he looks away, feeling stupid that they’re both blushing but Felix is blushing over something completely different. 

“Okay, you’ve dragged me in.” Ingrid crosses her legs and leans forward. “What’s the game and where can I find this fic?”

Dimitri looks like he’s about to explode with eagerness, so Dedue lets him do the talking, opting to calmly sip his coffee, basking in the love and appreciation. “I don’t play many games but… it’s called _Fire Emblem_! There are many games, but there is this one game where I was very invested in the relationship between two characters, Ephraim and Innes, and—”

“Oh, Sacred Stones, yeah I’ve played that one!” Sylvain pipes in. “I could get behind that. Y’know, Felix might actually like them.” He turns his head to try and drag Felix in the conversation — Felix turns back, makes eye contact with Sylvain and immediately frowns. 

“I’ve never played them.”

“There’s a cool swordsman in like, all of them.” Sylvain pokes his arm from across the table. “Very cool, very dashing.”

“And?”

“Well Innes isn’t a swordsman, but he’s kind of an asshole so you can relate to that, right?” Sylvain laughs, especially when Felix scowls at him. “Ephraim is a lord,” Sylvain turns back to Dimitri, “and you’re rich, so is he your kin-assigned Fire Emblem character?”

Dimtiri raises a brow. “I’m not sure I know what that means.”

“Literally ignore him.” Ingrid shakes her head. “He’s a walking shitpost.” 

“Well, I certainly appreciate this talk,” Dedue chimes in. “Writing fic is fun, especially when I can make my readers happy.”

“Yes, well, I’m happy you’re able to come down to Fhirdiad to visit me whenever I’m here.” Dimitri beams. “It’s one of the things I look forward to every year.” 

Now that Felix has allowed himself to join the conversation, something feels different. Maybe Sylvain _was_ right — it’s good to make new friends, and something about this group feels oddly comfortable, oddly familiar, oddly… nice. He doesn’t want to _admit_ that it’s nice though, wouldn’t be able to find the words for it even if he wanted to. Sitting and watching everyone laugh with Dimitri and Dedue feels… right? No, that can’t be the word he’s looking for. 

...Could it?

“How do the three of you know each other?” Dimitri’s voice brings Felix back. Although Dimitri had addressed all three of them, he’s looking pointedly at Felix, as if he noticed Felix had been quiet the whole time and was trying to bring him into the conversation. It’s sweet. Ugh.

“We’ve known each other since we were young.” Ingrid answers as she finishes her coffee. “Unfortunately, these two are my childhood friends and I had to grow up chasing after their nonsense.”

“Aw, it wasn’t that bad,” Sylvain makes a face. “Just think, if you hadn’t chased us around as kids you wouldn’t still be chasing us around now.”

“You act like I’m your parent,” she sighs. “I am not responsible for all your bad decisions.”

“All my bad decisions and yet you’re still here to walk me through them.” A soft smile curls its way onto Sylvain’s features, genuine this time, as he meets Ingrid’s gaze. “Oh, but anyway.” Sylvain singsongs and looks back at Dimitri and Dedue. “Hey, after this, we were going to take a walk around the park. If you were walking anyway, you wanna come with?”

“What?” Felix looks up to glare at Sylvain.

“As long as you don’t mind our company.” Dimitri leans back, as if that’s a good way to avoid Felix’s glares. It’s not. “We were headed in that direction, but we don’t have to tag along.”

“No, tag along,” Ingrid says. “Having more people to talk with is fun.”

“Speak for yourself,” Felix mutters under his breath, getting up to throw away his trash. “Are we ready to go?”

Dimitri downs the last of his tea and stands up. “Oh, yes!” He looks back at Dedue, “Ready?”

Dedue nods and gets up, and the two of them follow the trio out of the cafe. 

Felix hangs back, walking behind the group as they chat along the way to the park. 

“So,” Dimitri slows his steps to keep up with Felix. _Why is he so accommodating?_ “Childhood friends, huh?”

“Yeah,” is all Felix says.

“That must have been fun,” Dimitri continues, giving Felix a soft smile. “I grew up by myself until my father remarried and I met Edelgard.”

“Okay.” Felix isn’t certain how to continue this conversation. He isn’t completely sure he wants to, but at the same time something inside him really does.

So Dimitri keeps talking. “Do you have siblings?”

“I have an older brother. His name is Glenn.” 

“Oh, that’s nice. Edelgard and I are the same age.”

“Okay.” Damn it, Felix. He bites his lip at his awkwardness — at this point he’s not really sure if he’s trying to come off as disinterested, or if he’s just this bad at small talk. But Dimitri keeps talking, so Felix keeps listening. He learns about Dimitri’s father, Lambert, and his stepmother Patricia. He hears about the time Dimtiri couldn’t figure out a good gift for Edelgard’s birthday one year and gave her a dagger from the family collection. He listens to Dimitri babble on about small, intimate details that somehow don’t feel out of place to hear, as if he’s not just talking to him for the second time in his life, as if they’ve known each other forever and this was just another day, catching up on what happened in their lives. It’s strange, but at the same time it feels comforting. Almost nostalgic. 

And then… bittersweet.

Ahead of them, Ingrid insists that fellow foodie Dedue tries her favorite tacos from the street food cart that’s always at the park corner. “You have to try the al pastor — you like pineapple, right?” 

Felix can hear Ingrid chatter on in the distance as she and Dedue walk towards the other side of the park. Sylvain watches them leave, and then looks back at Felix, as if he’s unsure where he should go.

Felix gives him a face, what he thinks is conveying a “Stay here, idiot.” look. _Somehow_ Sylvain takes it as a “Give me some alone time with Dimitri who I have just met and _clearly_ want to spend some nice quiet time with” one instead, so Sylvain winks, finger-gunning before trotting off after Ingrid. Felix smacks his forehead.

“Is something wrong?” Dimitri asks. He seems to be oblivious of what just transpired.

“No.” Yes. No? Felix isn’t sure. He keeps walking, so Dimitri follows. “It’s a nice day.” 

_Seriously, the weather?_

“It is! This is why I like summers in Faerghus.” Dimitri smiles, all bright and cheerful, and Felix has to pry his gaze away or he’d be caught staring. “It’s much too hot back home right now.”

“What’s home like?” Felix asks, like he’s stuck in an endless cycle of weathery conversations. 

“Pherae is nice,” he says. “I like it there. But I think a part of me will always miss Fhirdiad.” A cool breeze blows through. It smells like grass and faintly of tacos, and it tousles Dimitri’s hair. Felix looks away like it’s a sight he shouldn’t see.

“It’s not that great,” Felix says, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Here, I mean. It’s whatever.” 

“Have you lived anywhere else?” 

“No.” Felix shrugs. “I’ve always lived in Fhirdiad. All my family is here.”

Dimitri turns his head to look at him, smiling politely. “Would you ever live elsewhere?”

Felix pauses. “I don’t know,” he says, after thinking for a moment. “Maybe.” He shakes his head. “It doesn’t matter.” 

Dimitri’s smile doesn’t waver, stuck on Felix like an annoying shadow. “Your friends have moved away and it feels like you’re stuck here, doesn’t it?”

Felix picks his head up, opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, and then at the last minute looks away. “You don’t know me.” 

“You’re right.” Dimitri’s smile drops and he stops walking, and it takes a few steps for Felix to realize. “My apologies, Felix. I didn’t mean to offend you.”

Felix huffs, shoulders hunching. “...It’s fine,” he says, nearly under his breath. “You didn’t.”

Dimitri’s eyes seem to light up at that, and then he seems to be thinking about what he’d like to say next. “It’s… true that I don’t know you, but…” He smiles again, this time looking a bit shy, and says, “I’d really like to.”

Another breeze tousles his hair. Dimitri looks nice in the sunlight. In the distance, he can hear Ingrid yelling at Sylvain for stealing a bite of her food. This feels like a scene Felix has seen in one of the C-dramas his mother watches on TV every night. He hates them, but surprisingly, he doesn’t hate this idea.

“We can…” Felix begins, like the words feel stuck in his throat. “We can hang out.” 

Dimitri brightens. “I’d love that! What do you like to do? Tell me all your hobbies! Let’s find something we have in common!” And then he seems to visibly dial it back. “Sorry, that might be a bit much.”

“It’s fine.” Felix toes at a pebble on the path. “I like… video games, I guess.”

“And I know you like swords!” Dimitri says. “Did you end up going to the sword exhibit at the museum?” 

Felix perks up at the mention of swords. “Yeah. It was cool, I guess. Had some pretty cool stuff.” Eloquent.

“Dedue and I went there afterwards. It’s quite exciting!” Dimitri starts to talk alongside Felix again, “Did you get to see the Sword of Moralta?”

“Yeah I did. It was right next to the Sword of Zoltan. Pretty expert craftsmanship.”

“Oh, yes! Zoltan was a fabled legendary artisan, many of his works are on display in the Fhirdiad museum,” Dimitri says. “I’m honestly thrilled so many were found and donated.”

“You seem to know a lot about him,” Felix says, nudging him with his elbow. “Are you a fan of his work?”

“Absolutely!” Dimitri says excitedly. “I’ve always wanted to know what it was like to swing one of his swords. Or hold one of his lances, perhaps even shoot one of his bows! It’s been a fascination of mine ever since I was young.”

“A rich guy like you could probably get a hold of them, can’t you?”

“Well…” Dimitri looks hesitant for a moment, bringing up a hand to scratch the back of his head. “I suppose it’s possible, but there’s no way they’d let me do that.” He laughs like he’s nervous, and then changes the subject. “Did you know that the sword of Moralta was passed down by the Fraldarius family? It was a sacred heirloom, if I recall correctly.”

“I vaguely remember hearing about it. Wasn’t there also a shield or something? My dad talks about these things sometimes.”

“The Aegis Shield, yes!” Dimitri says. “We have that shield back at the estate, actually.”

Felix raises a brow. “Like a replica?”

“No, the, um, the real thing,” Dimitri says slowly. “The Blaiddyd estate has several ancient relics, actually. Whatever was passed down from generation to generation, we have.” Felix doesn’t respond, so Dimitri turns to look at him and sees his shocked expression — eyes wide, lips parted like his words got caught in his mouth. “...Would you like to come over and see it sometime? We also have an entire weapons hall as well. Is that dangerous? Perhaps, but…”

“Yeah. Sure.” 

Felix gives himself a mental pat on the shoulder for playing that one cool. He’s excited as _hell_ at the mention of a weapons hall and ancestral relics to play with. He’d ask Dimitri to take him there right now if he didn’t think Sylvain and Ingrid would tease him endlessly later about ditching his friends for a _guy_. Not that his intentions are what they’d think they are, but… 

“Wait, why can’t you hold the weapons?”

“Oh, I, um…” Dimitri gives him a nervous laugh. “I am cursed with unbridled strength.”

He’s got to be kidding.

“What the hell does that mean?”

Sylvain’s voice cuts through the moment.

“What does what mean?” He, Ingrid, and Dedue walk back over to them. Dedue is handing Ingrid a napkin so she can dab at the sauce dribbling down her chin. She grabs it to wipe her mouth, adding to the crumpled ball of sauce-stained napkins in her hand. She bites into another taco, looking pleased at her snack, and Dedue laughs.

“I was telling Felix about um, I suppose, how strong I am?” Dimitri replies, and then backpedals. “I mean, not in a way that was supposed to be bragging or showing off or anything, I just mean—”

“Hey, I think that’s neat!” Sylvain says enthusiastically. 

“I have accidentally broken many things just by holding them.” Dimitri frowns, looking sad, almost like a kicked puppy. He doesn’t seem to think it’s neat. “I view it as a curse.”

“There are worse things to be cursed with,” Sylvain laughs, and then immediately looks serious and upset as his smile drops into a frown, brows furrowing. Felix rolls his eyes preemptively. “Like how I’m burdened with… huge meat syndrome,” he says dramatically. 

Dimitri, not catching on to the joke, is absolutely about to say, “Oh, I’m so sorry, that sounds serious,” before Ingrid groans. Felix pauses. Did Dimitri actually say that or did he just somehow read his mind or know how he was going to react? Felix knows Sylvain like the back of his hand, knows how Sylvain reacts to things and the faces he makes before he says something stupid, but why the fuck did he think he’d know how Dimitri was going to react?

“How do you even have friends?” She rolls her eyes.

“You’re still here, aren’t you? What’s that say about you?” Sylvain winks at her, which only makes her narrow her gaze. Dimitri exchanges glances with Dedue, who only shrugs. 

“They’re quite the interesting pair,” says Dedue, with a smile. “They’ve been like this the whole time.”

The group takes another loop around the park, chatting and laughing about all sorts of strange life experiences. In their senior year of high school, Ingrid took a waitressing job with a very specific uniform, one with a frilly apron and puffy sleeves, and Sylvain and Felix both dressed as her in said uniform for Halloween that year. Felix’s older brother Glenn is a med student and is constantly helping them out when they get into trouble. There was an entire summer where Sylvain couldn’t stop speaking exclusively in memes and it drove everyone crazy. Dedue’s younger sister makes viral online videos (“Is she a TikTok e-girl?” Sylvain asks, but Dedue refuses to watch the videos out of fear she may be.) and the conversation topic has Sylvain talking about the e-girl who sold her bathwater, which brings him to ask the group if they’d ever do that. Dimitri innocently responds that he prefers showers, and bottling up used shower water would be difficult.

They all agree it’s a weird conversation topic. 

* * *

Felix buys a Fire Emblem game later that day. He can’t remember which one they’d talked about, so he grabs the one that had the most interesting cover. 

“Whatever, it’s not like I’ll really get into this anyway,” he says, before getting sucked into the game and resurfacing half a day later, wondering where the time went. What the hell? Sylvain was right. It is good…

He’s a fan of Lon’qu, the lone swordsman character. If Felix was ever in a situation where he had a sword and needed to fight his way out, it’d be awesome if he could use a skill like Astra. Lon’qu looks so cool cutting down his enemies — he makes it look so effortless and he stays level headed about the whole thing. Being afraid of women is a dumb weakness though, Felix thinks, what kind of writing is that? If _he_ were in a Fire Emblem game, he wouldn’t have any weaknesses, and especially not towards women. 

Gaius sort of reminds Felix of Sylvain in a “they’re both sly redheads” kind of way, and he sees some of Ingrid in Sully in a “strong horse girl” kind of way. No sign of whatever everyone else was talking about earlier though. Did he buy the wrong game?

Aegis, the Fraldarius family cat, leaps onto his lap and gently headbutts Felix’s console. Felix looks up to scritch her head. “Hey girl,” he says to her as she curls up on top of him and purrs. “Did you know you’re named after a shield?” 

Aegis meows, and then stretches. Felix puts the game down and stares at the ceiling, idly petting Aegis’s head. “Must be nice to be a cat and not think about your problems, huh.” By problems, he supposes he means Dimitri. Felix’s mind has been stuck on how nice Dimitri’s smile is all day, and it’s starting to feel like he’s going through a crisis. 

_A very sexy crisis_. 

Sylvain’s voice worms its way into his head with what Felix assumes Sylvain would say in that moment. Felix grabs a pillow and smothers his face in it to squash the overwhelming urge to message Dimitri. Why does he want to so badly? _Why_ can’t he stop thinking about him? _Why_ can’t he stop thinking _in general_?

Despite his better judgement, he grabs his phone and messages Dimitri.

**FELIX**

i’m playing fire emblem.

**DIMITRI**

Oh! How do you like it?

**FELIX**

still don’t know what you’re talking about but lon’qu is cool.

**DIMITRI**

You’re playing Awakening! I love that one too. Dedue has written fanfiction about a relationship I really enjoy. I’m a huge fan of Chrom/Frederick!

**FELIX**

ok

Felix stares at the screen for a moment, then throws his phone across the room and goes to bed.


	2. Chapter 2

Felix’s phone lights up with a text notification from where it sits on his desk. Ingrid is messaging Lord Faer-squad, the group chat she’s in with Felix and Sylvain. It’s a link to an Instagram page, a “DAlexandre”, and opens to a picture of Dimitri and Dedue sharing drinks downtown at a bar called Conand Tower. 

Felix squints at his phone disapprovingly, even though Dimitri does look good in that picture. He messages the group back, and squints harder at the nickname that pops up with his reply. Sylvain set all of their nicknames months ago. Felix still doesn’t know why his is “Jeff”.

**Jeff**

ok?

**horse_ebooks**

That’s nearby! We HAVE to tell them about Arianrhod!! The drinks are SO much better there

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

Idk conand tower isnt bad lol

**horse_ebooks**

Arianrhod has the beer tower tho, let’s go share one with them it’s just down the street!

**Jeff**

no

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

I’m game

**horse_ebooks**

Overruled then, Felix! I just messaged Dimitri on Instagram.

**Jeff**

i hate you

**horse_ebooks**

You’ll thank me later when you’re in the throes of your hot summer romance

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

oh good! So i’m not the only one who sees the googly eyes

**Jeff**

FUCK YOU what googly eyes 

and who says I want a summer romance!!!

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

lol

**horse_ebooks**

Lol

**Jeff**

…

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

Anyway I’m down to clown. They said they’re both only here for the summer and I think they’re fun.

**Jeff**

you’re also only here for the summer dickwads

Felix tosses his phone on his bed and lets out the loudest frustrated groan he can manage. Aegis meows from his bed to match it. It must have been pretty loud, or badly timed, because there’s a knock on his door not long after. Glenn pokes his head in. “What’s up?”

“Nothing.”

“Okay, what’s wrong?”

“I just said nothing.”

“Okay, so go play with your friends then.”

Felix scoffs in response, so Glenn walks over to Felix’s bed to pet Aegis. The little cat flops over to her back to show off her stomach, wapping Glenn with her paws when he pokes at her fluff. “Aww who’s a good kitty?” Glenn coos at her. “A big bundle of fluff who loves Felix even though he’s more of a cat than you are, isn’t that right?”

Felix rolls his eyes. “What do you want, Glenn?”

“Go hang out with your friends!” he says, picking Aegis up to sit on his lap. “You’re on break and your friends won’t be home forever.” Aegis leaps off his lap almost as soon as he puts her there. “You’ve been cooped up in your room for a few days, isn’t it time to get out?”

“Tch…” Felix grumbles finally, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair. “They’d rather hang out with some other people.”

“Preeetty sure that’s Ingrid and Sylvain blowing up your phone asking where you are right now.” Glenn peeks at Felix’s forgotten phone where he tossed it on his bed. “They’re heading to Arianrhod without you, so if you don’t meet them there I might have to go instead.” He sticks his tongue out at his brother, but Felix isn’t looking at him. It’s not like Felix to look so down, so Glenn stops teasing him. 

“Hey, tell me what’s wrong.”

Felix looks away. “We met these guys and they’re fun to be around so that’s all Sylvain and Ingrid want to do now.”

“But you’re always included in their plans,” Glenn says pointedly. “Doesn’t that mean they want to hang out with these guys with you?”

“I just want to… hang out with the two of them.” Felix leans forwards to rest his arms on his desk, burrowing his face. “They’re trying to set me up with one of the guys.”

“Oh?” Glenn raises an eyebrow. “Do you want them to?”

“No!” Felix says loudly, and then, after a pause, a softer, “I don’t know.”

“Hanging out with old friends and having a cool summer fling sounds like an ideal summer to me,” Glenn teases him with a smile. “I can tell you how a few of my summers went.”

“Ugh, no.” Felix makes a face and swivels his chair away. “I’d rather go out with Dimitri than hear about where your dick has been.”

“Oh so his name is Dimitri, huh?” Glenn smirks at him, “That’s a nice name. Together you’d be Femitri. Or Dimilix. Or something. What’s his last name?” Glenn picks up Felix’s phone before he finishes the question, leaning away and holding it out of arms reach before Felix can snatch it back. “ _ Blaiddyd _ ? Oh _ yes _ , you can be  _ Fraldarddyd _ .” He’s laughing too hard to keep a grip on Felix’s phone, and it’s yanked out of his hands quickly. 

“Fuck off, Glenn.” Felix gets up to leave. “I’m going out.”

“Tell Dimitri I said hi!” Glenn calls after him, and once Felix is out of range, Aegis meows at him. “What? Can’t a guy tease his baby brother without judgment?” 

Aegis meows again, and paws at his leg for attention. 

“You’re right, Aegis. We  _ do  _ ship Dimilix.”

* * *

Sylvain immediately spots Felix when he walks into Arianrhod and flags him down. Sylvain and Dedue sit on one side of the corner table, and Ingrid and Dimitri sit on the other. They’ve pulled up a chair so Felix can have a guest of honor-esque seat, conveniently placed right next to Dimitri.

“Hey!” Sylvain greets his friend. “You made it! What took you so long?” The rest of the table greets him as he walks over.

“Talking to Glenn,” Felix says quickly, taking his seat before anyone can ask him anything else, and especially before Dimitri says anything. He’s looking like he’s gearing up for a “Nice to see you again” and Felix doesn’t want to give him the chance to say it. “What are you drinking?” He points at Sylvain’s drink, some fancy cocktail that bubbles a bright red, and Sylvain stirs it around with his straw. 

“It’s one of their specials tonight, it’s called the Valley of Torment,” Sylvain says, “It’s like… sweet and spicy. You wanna try?” He slides over his glass anyway, and Felix pushes it back.

“It’s fine. I’ll just get my usual.” Really, he just doesn’t want Dimitri to start talking the second the glass touches Felix’s lips. 

“Maybe you’ll like this one!” Ingrid passes over her drink, a tall clear cocktail with a sprig of mint as a garnish. “It’s the Silver Maiden, Arianrhod’s signature. It’s good!” 

“What’s in it?” Felix asks, his gaze darting between the drink, Ingrid, and occasionally Dimitri at his side. 

“I think it’s like their take on a gin and tonic.” Ingrid stirs her straw around so the drink fizzes. “I think you’d like it.”

Dimitri looks like he’s nursing a beer, and Dedue is drinking what looks to be whiskey and ginger ale. Sylvain downs his drink with a loud slurping sound and scoots out of his chair. “C’mon buddy, I’m heading up to the bar for another drink. Let’s get you something to loosen you up!” 

He smacks Felix on the shoulder a few times before Felix begrudgingly gets up. He’s dragged to the bar, where Sylvain winks repeatedly at the bartender in an attempt to get her to notice him. It doesn’t work.

“So,” Sylvain starts, “What’s up?”

“Nothing.” 

“You doing okay? You’ve been a little off lately.”

“I said it’s nothing.” 

“Okay, but you wouldn’t be saying it’s nothing if it was really nothing.” Sylvain straightens, and then leans against the bar. “You’d say,  _ Fuck you Sylvain! _ Or something.” 

The bartender finally comes over and Sylvain orders a beer, and Felix orders the same thing Ingrid was pushing on him. He trusts she knows his taste by now. The bartender shakes Felix’s drink, before cracking Sylvain’s beer open and sliding the drinks to them. Sylvain takes a big sip and looks at Felix expectantly. 

Felix takes a small sip of his drink. It’s good. He’s satisfied with his choice, so he stirs it around with the straw. “I said there’s nothing wrong, okay?”

“Nuh-uh, and that’s what gives it away.” Sylvain points at him with the beer in his hand. “You can’t play this game with me, I’ve known you for too long.”

“I didn’t even say anything!” 

“Felix, come on.” Sylvain frowns. “You know we’re here for you. Ingrid and I are your best friends and we care about you, so spill it. What’s wrong?” 

Felix is quiet for a moment, like if he doesn't say anything Sylvain will just leave him alone and forget he even brought anything up. And he knows Sylvain knows him well enough that he should know that’s what Felix is thinking. But he also knows Sylvain cares about him enough to not take no for an answer. So they reach a stalemate of silence until Sylvain adjusts his posture, cants a hip and steps away from the bar and says, “I’ll drop it for now, but we better talk later, Fe. C’mon, let’s get back to the others.” 

It’s only after his second drink that Felix feels okay with being out right now. It isn't the ideal situation, but he’s starting to care a little less after watching Sylvain and Dedue pound back a heavy pour of Laphroaig, which has Ingrid gasping loudly because did you really just take Laphroaig  _ like a shot _ ? And Sylvain slams the bottom of his glass on the table and screams because he just drank Laphroaig for the first time and it tastes like rotting wood and a smoking tire fire, and it’s overtaken his senses and left him for dead, and Dedue is laughing because it’s a trick he likes to play. He’s only met one other person who’s ever enjoyed the taste of Laphroaig Islay Single Malt Scotch Whisky, and that person did not drink like Sylvain.

Dimitri laughs like someone who has fallen for that trick before and finds it hilarious when it isn’t happening to him. 

“You either like it or hate it,” Dedue says, rolling the base of his glass around the table. “And I happen to like it.” 

By the time they’re pleasantly tipsy and leaving the bar, Felix is feeling better. Sylvain is making one big group chat for the five of them and promising not to name it something weird,  _ promises _ not to give anyone weird nicknames. “I’ll keep it appropriate if we can go to the park playground. There’s no way there are kids up this late at night so,” Sylvain spins around and waggles his eyebrows, “it’s free real estate.”

“Just don’t do anything stupid!” Ingrid chides, knowing full well he was  _ not _ going to do that.

The playground is as empty as Sylvain thought it would be, and he immediately climbs up a slide to hurl himself down, landing on the padded rubber flooring face first. Felix wanders over to the swingset, taking a seat on one of the swings and rocking gently back and forth. 

“How are you, Felix?” Dimitri sidles up to Felix as the rest of them climb around the playground. Ingrid is showing off her upper body strength on the monkey bars. “You’ve been a little quiet today.”

“I’m fine,” he says, once again. “It’s nothing.”

“May I sit next to you?” Dimitri points at the swing next to Felix like he needs the permission. Felix just shrugs, so Dimitri takes it as a yes and joins him, swaying. 

They sit together in silence for a bit, watching whatever the others are doing on the playground. Sylvain is trying to come up with different ways to shoot himself down a slide. Ingrid is trying to see how fast she can climb  _ up _ the slide. Dedue is trying to climb the small plastic rock climbing section, which is clearly meant for children, so he’s having some trouble finding good footing. Felix and Dimitri watch them from the swingset, comfortable swaying back and forth by each other. 

“So…” Dimitri breaks the silence, and he sounds a bit awkward. “Tonight was nice.”

“Yeah. Was okay.” 

“Sorry I…” Dimitri looks away, at the floor where he kicks up a small bit of dirt. “I don’t mean to take away your time with your friends.”

Felix looks up then, at Dimitri who won’t look at him. “What?”

“You’ve been upset that Dedue and I have been around, haven’t you?” Dimitri asks, almost sheepishly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude.”

Felix sighs, his grip on the swing chains tightening. Finally, he says, “You’re not.” Dimitri looks at him then, meets his gaze with a small glimmer in his eyes. “I... thought that before. But not anymore.” 

It’s true he’s still feeling it a little, but something about the way Dimitri looks at him breaks that spell. Makes spending time with him feel...worth it. He can’t really describe it in any way other than that.

“I’m… glad to hear it.” Dimitri is just as awkward as he is. “I know you don’t get to see them aside from school breaks. They’re only here for the summer.”

“Yeah,” Felix says, swinging. “But you’re also only here for the summer.”

Dimitri smiles, holding Felix’s gaze, and for a moment that’s all Felix can think about. He stops swinging to gaze back at Dimitri  — it’s familiar, the way he beams at him. The way he looks at him, like he’s known him before and just can’t quite place it. Familiar, like déjà vu washing over him like a wave, leaving Felix with no choice but to go along with the tide. Felix wants to break the gaze and say something, but he can’t think of anything except how blue Dimitri’s eyes are. He’s seen that blue before  — azure, beryl, cerulean  — at the back of his mind. 

His favorite. 

Luckily, Dimitri speaks first, and Felix snaps back to reality. Dimitri swings closer to Felix. “Can I tell you something?”

Felix doesn’t move away from Dimitri’s motion, but he doesn’t move towards him either. “What?”

“I am… very interested in getting to know you,” he says, looking like he wants to get closer but isn’t sure. “I don’t mean to come off as too forward. Is it… strange to say you’re drawn to someone you’ve only met recently?”

If he’d asked him this before they met, Felix would say yes, absolutely. No one is drawn to people they just meet. Everyone is a stranger you can’t trust. Don’t be foolish. 

_ Say it’s strange, tell him off. _

Instead, Felix holds his breath and manages a strangled, “No.”

As much as he doesn’t want to admit it, there’s a weird pull at the back of Felix’s skull telling him it’s okay. Telling him he wants to be around Dimitri. And admittedly, a large part of Felix wants to get to know Dimitri better too. 

The part of him who’s hung out with Sylvain too much adds onto that with, _ in more ways than one. _

Felix exhales forcefully. It comes off as a frustrated huff, or maybe a sneeze. Dimitri pulls back. 

“Are you cold?” Yeah, he thought it was a sneeze.

“I’m not cold,” he says, forcing his gaze away from Dimitri to check on his other friends. Sylvain and Dedue have climbed onto the log rollers and are trying to race each other to nowhere. Ingrid is scolding them, ranting about how these rollers are dangerous, a kid could knock their teeth out if they fall, it’s a lawsuit waiting to happen! Who thought these were a good idea! Sylvain, Dedue, you’ve had alcohol! Kids get hurt on these things sober!

Dimitri looks like he wants to intervene, but Felix shakes his head. 

“Sylvain’s only going to learn if he gets hurt.” 

“It sounds like this is a common occurrence,” Dimitri chuckles, earnest and kind. “I’m interested in hearing what other things you’ve all done together.”

“Ha. You really don’t.” Felix starts to swing again. “You might get scared off.”

“Oh? Try me!” Dimitri laughs, swaying around. “I’ll tell you the strange things I’ve gotten up to.”

“Once Sylvain and I got so drunk we ended up on top of Fhirdiad’s library.” It’s a funny story that Felix barely remembers. “We had no idea where we were, or how we even got up there. We called Ingrid like she could do anything for us.” 

“How did you get down?” Dimitri asks, sounding invested. 

“Ingrid told us to get bent. I have no idea. I blacked out and woke up at home.”

Dimitri bursts into laughter. His laugh sounds sweet, full-bodied, almost like a song with a playful lilt at the tail end. Felix wants to make him laugh again.

He hears a pained yelp from Sylvain from across the playground, and he’s ripped from the moment. Ingrid yells.

“I told you so! Look what I said would happen!” 

Dedue is hovering over them, asking, “Oh no, Sylvain, are you okay?!” Felix sighs a long sigh, rushing over to check on them. Dimitri follows closely behind.

Sylvain is on the floor clutching his chin, and blood seeps from in between his fingers. “Haha, I fell.” He’s laughing. Of course he’s laughing.

“We should get that looked at,” Dedue says hurriedly. “He might need stitches, he landed on the roller pretty hard.”

“I’m okay!” Sylvain manages, “It’s not that bad, look, the bleeding is probably going to stop soon!”

Ingrid groans. “And once again, Ingrid is right! But who’s listening to her? Unsurprisingly, no one!” Ingrid pulls a cloth from her bag and holds it out to Sylvain. Her tone shifts and she says, calmly, “We should call Glenn.”

“I’m fiiiine!” Sylvain calls out, taking the cloth from Ingrid and replacing his bloodied fingers with it. “It looks worse than it is, I promise.”

Felix groans and whips out his phone to check the time. “His shift’s already started, I can’t call. We have to just go there.”

“Where?” Dimitri looks concerned, helping Sylvain to his feet.

“My brother interns at the local medical center,” Felix explains, picking up Sylvain’s things. “We’ll take him there.”

“Is that… allowed?” 

Felix shrugs. “Probably not, but he does it.”

“Let’s get him back to my car.” Dimitri offers, the adrenaline clearing his head. “I’ll drive. I’m fine to do so  — I knew I’d have to drive home so I only had one beer.” They shuffle a bleeding Sylvain back to the bar’s parking lot, where Felix and Ingrid all but dump him in the backseat and climb over him. Dedue gets in the front passenger seat, looking guilty despite Ingrid telling him Sylvain would have done this anyway. The drive to the clinic isn’t far, and the front desk calls for Glenn immediately when Felix drags him inside.

“Does this happen a lot?” Dedue asks after the nurse took one good look at Sylvain and shook her head like this was a normal occurrence. Sylvain waves at her.

Felix groans. “You have no idea.” 

“Not to say ‘I told you so,’ but _ I told you so _ .” Ingrid crosses her arms and leans her weight on one leg. 

Felix rolls his eyes. “Yeah, like you’re one to talk. We’ve had to drag your ass here too.” He shoots her a narrow glare. “Remember that time you tried to climb on the horse statue downtown when we were all drunk?”

“Oh my,” Dimitri’s eyebrows raise curiously. “What happened?”

“She fell, like an idiot.” Felix keeps his gaze on Ingrid even when she looks away with a huff. “Fractured her arm in three different places or something. I don’t remember. Glenn was pissed.”

Glenn struts out to meet them and raises his arms, exasperated. “I can’t keep doing this, you know! I’m not a full fledged doctor yet.”

“Oh come on, you keep this place running with your internship alone.” Felix shoves Sylvain at him. “They’d be idiots to fire you.”

“I’m pretty sure you three keep this place running with how much you get injured.” Glenn retorts, and has Sylvain sit down on the exam table. Ingrid and Dedue decide not to crowd the small room, so they wait outside. Dimitri looks like he isn’t sure where he should go, eyes darting back and forth between Felix and the door, shuffling his weight back and forth between both legs. Glenn takes one good look at him and goes, “So you’re Dimitri, huh?” so his stance relaxes and he stops shuffling. He takes a step closer towards Felix.

“Um, yes.” He looks at Felix, wondering if that means Felix is talking about him to Glenn.

“I’m Glenn. I’m these idiots’ budget urgent care. I have no importance in their lives otherwise,” he says sarcastically, but his lips curve into a wide smile. Felix recognizes that shit-eating grin, he must be delighted to have fucking  _ Fraldarddyd _ or whatever the fuck it was in the room.

Felix rolls his eyes and crosses his arms defensively. “Glenn.”

“Oh, and I happen to be this idiot’s older brother.” 

Glenn finishes cleaning up Sylvain and rolls back in his chair. “And  _ this  _ idiot is fine. Just scraped up, no stitches needed.”

“Isn’t that what I’ve been saying?” Sylvain says, touching the bandage Glenn applied to his chin before Glenn can tell him not to touch it. “Jeez, you’re all overreacting!”

Everyone else in the room sighs. 

Dimitri offers to drive everyone home. He drops off Sylvain first. Ingrid insists on making sure he doesn’t make any more dumb decisions tonight, so despite his reassurances, she goes with him. Dedue is on the way next, so Felix hops into the front seat after Dedue leaves. 

“Guess you’ll have to tell me where you live…” Dimitri teases, “I promise I won’t use this information for evil.”

It’s an awkwardly quiet drive. It feels as if both of them want to say something, take advantage of this time alone. But neither of them do  — neither of them say a word and break the silence. Dimitri pulls in front of Felix’s house; Felix doesn’t quite make a motion to leave yet. He opens his mouth to say something just as Dimitri opens his, so Felix shuts his, but Dimitri has already closed his as well. It’s frustrating, but — Felix tries to push down his irritation and waits him out. 

Finally, _ finally,  _ Dimitri says, “Your brother seems nice.”

“Yeah,” Felix whispers, and finally moves to open the door. “Thanks for the ride.”

“Of course.” Dimitri moves his hand to rest idly on the gear stick, but accidentally brushes his hand against Felix’s as he starts to move. “Oh, I’m sorry.” 

Felix scrambles out of the car at the contact, and then turns to close the door. “Okay. Bye.”

“Felix, is it alright if I messaged you sometime?” Dimitri’s words tumble out of his mouth too quickly, like he’s nervous about asking. “We should… hang out. Together.”

Felix looks away and crosses his arms. “Yeah. Sure. Text me whenever.”

“Okay!” Dimitri’s voice has a newfound confidence to it. “I will… see you later, then.”

“Yeah.”

“Good night! I hope you, um, sleep well.” 

“Sure.” Felix looks around awkwardly. “Just, uh. Message me when you’re home, or whatever.” And then he adds, “Or don’t. I’ll probably be asleep.” 

Dimitri only smiles charmingly at him. “I will, thanks!” Felix’s heart skips a beat and he slams the car door shut. He watches him drive off before going back inside. 

He gets a text message from Dimitri about 20 minutes later. Just a simple, “I’m home!” sends Felix into an array of weird emotions and he decides not to respond.

* * *

Sylvain changed the name of the group chat to PRC (People’s Republic of Cock)

Sylvain changed his nickname to Dick Prime

Dick Prime changed Ingrid’s nickname to horse_peenbooks

**horse_peenbooks**

Sylvain! You promised!

Dick Prime changed Dimitri’s nickname to Mighty Royal Cock

**Mighty Royal Cock**

Oh my.

Dick Prime changed Dedue’s nickname to The Big D(ick)

**The Big D(ick)**

Haha

**Felix**

don’t do it

don’t you Dare

i’ll kill you

Dick Prime changed Felix’s nickname to Richard

**Richard**

ugh.

* * *

Felix’s phone screen lights up at dinner and he almost has to fight Glenn for his own phone. 

“I just want to see if it’s Dimitri!” Glenn haggles, arm still outstretched from where he’d grabbed Felix’s phone and swiftly got it wrestled away.

“It’s my phone, idiot!” Felix scoffs, “It’s none of your business who texts me!”

“Dimitri?” Rodrigue raises a curious brow and looks at Felix. “Who is Dimitri?”

Felix is quick to say, “No one,” at the same time Glenn eagerly says, “A boy!”

Felix glares at Glenn, who gives him a winning smirk.

“It’s  _ no one, _ dad. Just a friend,” Felix huffs. “And it might not even be him, it’s probably just my stupid group chat with Sylvain and Ingrid — ” 

He checks his phone. It’s Dimitri. 

**DIMITRI**

Hello Felix! Do you happen to be free tonight?

**FELIX**

i’m eating dinner

**DIMITRI**

Oh! Sorry to interrupt. 

**FELIX**

it’s fine my brother is just being an idiot

**DIMITRI**

Well, if you’re free afterwards, would you perhaps... would you like to come over?

Felix’s cheeks tint at the message, and he looks up from his phone. Glenn’s staring at him. “What? Fuck off, Glenn.”

“Language!” His mother scolds from across the table, giving Felix a pointedly disappointed stare. Felix groans. 

“...Go away, Glenn,” he corrects himself, and then looks back at his mother, whose stare lessens, but lingers even as she turns back to eat her food. “...Sorry, mom.”

“I’m eating dinner, you can’t tell me to go away,” Glenn teases, shoving a heaping mound of rice into his mouth. “So was it Dimitri?” he manages through a full bite, which doesn’t really sound much like the sentence he’s trying to say.

“ _ Glenn _ .” His mother redirects her glare at him. She doesn’t have to say anything else to get Glenn to guiltily swallow the bite and clear his throat. “Sorry mom.” 

“Felix, finish your food if you want to go anywhere,” Rodrigue says, after Felix looks like he really wants to say something, but doesn’t want his mom to get upset at him. At his father’s words, Felix scarfs down the rest of his food and almost tosses his bowl in the sink. 

“Okay bye,” he says, hurriedly putting his shoes on and rushing out the door. 

“Damn, kid’s got it bad.” Glenn says as the rest of the family stares after him.

“ _ Glenn _ .” 

* * *

The Blaiddyd Estate is a few metro stops away, so it’s not really a hassle to get there. Which is fine, he didn’t expect it to be tough, but he also didn’t expect it to be such a swanky looking mansion. Felix must have gawked long enough at the huge, ornate gates after sending his “I’m here” text, because Dimitri is already walking up to let him in. 

“Ah, Felix! You made it!” He greets him with a wave. 

Felix steps through the gates as they open for him. “Yeah, didn’t know you lived in a fucking museum.” 

Dimitri chuckles. “Well, like I’d mentioned, my family came from royalty so… all of this is extremely old money.” He leads Felix across a long driveway to the front door, guarded by several large stone lions. “Most of this was built centuries ago by my ancestors. It used to be a castle, actually, for the Blaiddyd monarchs. It’s gone through a lot of modern renovations as time wore it down and somewhere down the line, it was reconstructed to be more of a, well, mansion, I suppose. I’ve only ever really seen it like this.” 

Dimitri walks him inside and flashes him a smile. 

“Would you like the grand tour?”

Felix walks through a marble foyer decorated with lights and paintings, towards a huge grand entryway with a double gilded staircase. All he can think to say is, “This is… impressive.” 

“The house mostly looks like this,” DImitri explains, “Large. Expensive. Empty. Even with my entire family and the housekeepers, it still feels empty.”

“You have _ housekeepers _ ?” Felix asks incredulously. It makes sense but it still feels like he’s living some sort of fantasy tale.

“Well, yes?” Dimitri looks a little sheepish at that. “It’s nearly impossible to take care of a place like this otherwise.” 

He walks over to a large room, maybe a den, with a soft looking sectional couch that sits across from the largest flat screen TV Felix has ever seen in his life. Across the room is a bar, an actual bar that looks like it could belong in a restaurant, and an ice machine. A wide selection of various liquors and cordials decorate the shelves. There’s also another shelf for wines and beer, and a small fridge to store the colder things. For all intents and purposes, this actually  _ could be _ a commercial bar. There’s even a soda gun attachment, though Dimitri says it’s not connected to anything. 

“Do you want a drink?” Dimitri asks, sliding behind the bar to grab a beer. “There’s beer and wine in the fridge, or I can make you something.” He turns to look at the vast array of liquor and cordials on the shelves. “I think we have enough to make most drinks if you’re thinking about something specific.”

“I noticed,” Felix says, hopping up on a tall bar seat. “It’s a pretty big collection, are you a big drinker?”

Dimitri laughs and shakes his head, “No, I don’t know much about alcohol, honestly. My dad likes to try a lot of different things. He’ll usually have something at a restaurant or a bar and then try to recreate it at home.”

“Has he ever bartended?”

“I don’t think so. It’s hard to imagine my father doing anything like that.” Dimitri smiles at Felix. “You seem to know more than I do.”

“I bartended for a bit,” Felix says quickly. “It was a dumb restaurant job.”

“Tell me about it.” Dimitri moves to sit next to him on one of the bar seats. He doesn’t have to hop up to make it on the chair. “What was that like?” 

“Eh.” Felix shrugs. “Worked there for maybe a year before they fired me for trying to fight a customer. Wasn’t my fault, he was annoying.”

“Did you get a lot of annoying customers?”

“Yeah, of course I did. I had guys trying to pick me up every day with their dumb life stories. Sometimes I’d get older guys trying to pay me to meet them after my shift. I once had a guy call me a bitch cause I didn’t want to go home with him.”

“Oh…” Dimitri frowns, “I didn’t know the service industry was so…” He trails off.

“Anyway, I tried to fight some guy who grabbed my hand while I handed him his drink, so they fired me.” Felix shrugs again. “It’s whatever, I’m glad I’m out of there.”

“And you have all that bartending knowledge with you,” Dimitri says with a smile, like he’s trying to make him feel better. “It must come in handy, I can imagine it’s useful.”

“I can make you a drink if that’s what you want.” Felix turns to face Dimitri. “What’s something you like to drink?”

“Ah, really?” Dimitri’s face lights up, and he slides the unopened beer can away. “I enjoy most things.” Felix hops off the chair and walks behind the bar, looking around for a shaker and a jigger. 

“Be more specific. What flavors do you like? What things do you not drink?” 

“Okay, uh, hmm.” Dimitri pauses to think, and then says, “Um, I’m not picky. I enjoy whiskey occasionally. Nothing too sweet, though.” 

Felix whisks up a drink in record time. He knows it’s fun to watch him  — Felix grabs some bourbon, some simple syrup, some amaretto, even cuts up a lemon to squeeze it in the shaker. He moves in practiced motions, from the way he pours to the way he flips the shaker playfully, like he’s putting on a show. He is, in a sense. A private show for Dimitri. 

Felix slides over a glass, fills it with ice, and strains his creation in, slicing up more of the lemon for garnish. “Amaretto sour.” He gently presents Dimitri with the drink. “Enjoy.” 

“That was quite the show.” Dimitri’s practically sparkling. Felix had gotten used to patrons at his bar complimenting him, but hearing Dimitri say it has him feeling warm. He tucks a strand of hair behind his ear.

“I’m out of practice.”

“I wouldn’t have known if you hadn’t told me.” Dimitri brings the drink to his lips and takes a small sip. His expression lights up. “This is really good.”

“Yeah, sometimes the place I worked at got fancy and made egg white foam for it too.” Felix says after washing out his tools, and then starts to make a drink for himself too. He grabs some gin, the rest of the lemon, and another bottle Dimitri says he doesn’t recognize. It’s a clear liqueur with a small flower insignia on the label. He makes himself a drink then tops it off with some club soda. 

“What’s that?” Dimitri asks as Felix takes back his seat.

“A drink,” Felix says, obviously. “Gin and some elderflower liqueur.” He takes a sip, and when he puts down the glass and looks at Dimitri, he’s met with a smile. “What?”

“Nothing, Felix. I’m just glad that you’re here,” comes the reply, and Felix grumbles at how such an innocuous comment makes his face feel hot. 

There’s a pause, long enough to hold a soft gaze before Felix looks away. “Honestly, I thought you were inviting everyone else too,” he says, averting his eyes. “I didn’t expect it to just be me.”

“I told you I wanted to get to know you better,” Dimitri explains, crossing his legs and taking another sip of his drink. “I like talking to you. I hope you forgive my forwardness.” Felix rolls his eyes, but he does it with a small smirk creeping up on the corners of his mouth. 

“You told me you had a weapons hall,” he says, spinning the bar stool a bit. “I want to see it.”

“Oh, sure!” Dimitri steps off the chair, taking his drink with him. “I can show you whatever you want to see.” 

Felix knows he’s just talking about the mansion, realistically knows that is absolutely what Dimitri is saying without innuendo, and yet, his mind wanders.  _ God dammit, Sylvain _ .

He’s still stuck on various Dimitri Thoughts, Forbidden (DTF) when he finds himself in another hallway. Dimitri points at different paintings and decorations on the wall, explaining their historical significance to his family. Dimitri gestures to a painting of a man with blonde hair and a crown, a stern expression on his bearded face. “This is King Lambert, supposedly my ancestor. My father was named after him.”

“Oh. Okay,” is all Felix responds with. His eyes wander to another painting, another blonde man seated beside someone else. The details of this one look a bit worn from time: it’s hard to tell who the other person is or what he looks like aside from faded dark hair. “Who are they?”

“Oh! This is King Dimitri! My namesake.” Dimitri smiles, admiring the painting. “He was King Lambert’s son, so my father thought it would be fun to name me Dimitri as well.”

“Who’s next to him?”

“I’m not sure. I believe he was his advisor, his right hand man,” Dimitri says. “Historically, it’s possible he was a Fraldarius.” He catches Felix’s gaze after saying that, and winks. Felix scoffs. 

“Or it’s a coincidence,” Felix sips the drink he brought with him, “that we’ve met.”

“It could be a coincidence!” Dimitri laughs, “Or maybe it’s fate.”

Felix groans at the mention of the word, and Dimitri just chuckles and leads him into another hall. It’s filled with various Blaiddyd ancestral weapons and royal artifacts, even an old gilded throne at the end of the hall. The busy walls are decorated with swords, spears, shields, and the like: it’s really impressive. Jeweled scepters and staves, ornate plaques, and celebratory outfits adorn the dark blue walls of the brightly lit hallway. Various mystical items, almost magical in appearance, stand on padded altars, protected by a thick pane of glass. It’s almost like walking into a museum, Felix thinks, except the weapons on display are within reach, and  —  Goddess, might Dimitri let him hold one?

It’s like Dimitri knows what Felix is about to say, because he smiles and says, “The blades on these weapons are really dull, so it’s okay if you want to hold them.” And he doesn’t wait for Felix to react or ask him in any way before he picks up a dull sword from across the room. “This is the one I told you about, a sword crafted by Zoltan.”

“I thought we saw that sword at the museum?” Felix asks, but excitedly grips the sword by the hilt anyway the moment Dimitri (safely) hands it over to him. 

“Zoltan made several! This is just another. And it’s certified genuine as well.” He steps back to let Felix admire the craftsmanship, and to let him swing it if he wanted to. “Everything in this room has to go through a very thorough background check. There’s a lot of imitations out there.”

“I bet,” is all Felix can say, distracted by the blade in his hand. It’s slightly rusted, but it’s been centuries since this blade was forged. It’s highly unlikely it was given the proper care after so many years. He very gently swings it, like he’s seen in movies and video games, and for a moment he feels powerful. 

Something else catches his eye. He turns to look at another glass case hanging on the wall. Inside is a shield, gold and slightly dented, with an interesting curved design. There’s a light inside the display case to show off the details, but as Felix steps closer, the shield seems to glow. 

This can’t be possible. It must be just a trick of light. He reaches out to touch the glass and swears the shield pulses faintly. 

“What… is this?” Felix asks, almost mesmerized. 

“The Aegis Shield, passed down through the Fraldarius family,” Dimitri explains, walking over. “I mentioned it to you the other day.”

“Is it supposed to glow?”

“Glow?” Dimitri peers through the glass. “I don’t see it glowing.”

“It was, just before — oh, forget it,” Felix backtracks, not wanting to sound stupid. “It must just be the light or something.”

“You know, if things were different, you might have had that shield.” Dimitri begins, and then as if realizing what he just said, shuts his mouth quickly and bites his bottom lip before continuing. “I mean, luckily you don’t need that shield today. I just mean it was an important relic in the Fraldarius family back in the day, so — ”

“No, I get it,” Felix says distantly, turning to look at the shield again. “I know what you mean.” 

There’s a pause, an odd silence between them, and it feels familiar. The faint sense of déjà vu has bothered Felix ever since he met Dimitri, but looking at the shield with a sword in his hand feels… too familiar. Felix has never held a sword in his life, not a real one at least, but standing beside Dimitri like this is… strange? Unusual? Eerie? He can’t quite put the words to the feeling. He steps back and hands Dimitri the sword to place back on the wall. 

“So, anyway, I assume that was the royal throne or something?” He points to the padded gilded chair down the hall. 

“Yeah, they moved it from the main room when this place was remodeled,” Dimitri says, walking over to it. “Seeing as we don’t need a royal throne in the dining room nowadays.” He runs his hand along the worn armrest, rubbing a small circle with his thumb on the faded fabric. 

“When I was a kid, I’d come in here with a fake crown. I would sit down on the throne and play pretend as a fantasy king, or at least some crown prince of a nation. My ancestor was King Dimitri of Faerghus, so I demanded to be him too. My step-sister, Edelgard  — we used to play this game together where I was King Dimitri and she was Emperor Edelgard of Adrestria, and we’d pretend to fight like dueling monarchs. Thankfully, our battles never ended the same way, and we’d decide to get along instead.” He sits down on the chair, crossing his legs. 

“I always got to sit on this throne though. She gets the one at the Hresvelg estate in Enbarr. I don’t know why we’d argue about this, it’s just a chair.” After Felix didn’t respond, Dimitri picks his head up. “Felix?” 

The sight of Dimitri sitting on the old throne makes Felix freeze, as though it’s awakened something in him. He doesn’t even know why. Dimitri mouths, “Felix?” but he doesn’t respond.

The dim lighting above the chair, the way Dimitri rests his elbow on one of the arm rests and tilts his head up at him  — Felix is overcome with a n overwhelming rush of emotion. Like he’s seen it before, and it’s not just a stray thought, not just an overactive imagination or something he’s seen in a book or a movie or a video game  — maybe in a dream or a some sort of vision or flashback  — and honestly, Felix really isn’t sure what to make of it at all. 

He’s just met Dimitri. How could he have such a strong image of Dimitri sitting on a throne? They live in a normal society, in a modern world where the Blaiddyds are only distant royals with no claim to any power. Faerghus isn’t even a monarchy anymore!

“Felix?” 

His name, repeated in Dimitri’s concerned voice, jolts him from his thoughts. Felix shakes his head to bring himself back to earth again. “Is something wrong?”

“Um, no,” Felix says, and then reaches for his drink he put down and forgot about on one of the pedestals. He takes a long sip. “Just thinking.”

“About what?” Dimitri asks with another tilt of his head and a smile. 

“Ugh. This video game I played, I think,” Felix mumbles, the first lie he can think of. “There was someone who looked like you or something. Maybe it’s just the blonde hair.”

“Ah, could be.” 

“Well…. Anyway. It’s getting late, I should go.” Felix downs the rest of his drink and clears his throat. “My parents are weird about me staying out.” 

They’re not  — not _ really, _ anyway, his parents have their rules but he’s currently well within them. But the foreign, strange tugging Felix feels in the pit of his stomach feels uncomfortable, and he kind of just wants to curl up in bed with a video game and not worry about making conversation with a cute boy. Er, that is, Dimitri.

“Oh, so soon?” Dimitri gets up and walks over. “Let me drive you home.” 

“That’s okay, I can walk,” he says. “It’s a nice night.”

“Oh.” Dimitri looks disappointed, and Felix immediately regrets saying anything, but he’s already made up his mind. “Well… can I see you again sometime?”

“Yeah,” Felix says, like he’s trying to tell Dimitri that he’s not leaving because of anything Dimitri did. “Yeah, I had fun. We should… hang out again sometime.” 

Dimitri perks up again at his words.

“Fantastic! I’ll walk you to the door, then?” He leads Felix over with a very brief touch on the back. It sends a strange tingle down Felix’s spine. He’s not sure he hates it. 

The walk back is uneventful and quiet, exactly what Felix needed to clear his head. It doesn’t take too long to walk back from the metro, and then back over to his place, and the second he walks through the door, Rodrigue is on him like a hawk, asking him anything and everything: How was your friend? What did you do? Did you have fun? Did you do anything I should know about?  _ Is  _ there anything I should know about? 

Felix groans. 

“My friend is _ fine,  _ we just hung out and that’s all I’m gonna say, oh my god,” he says, rolling his eyes. He looks around for Glenn, knowing his brother is going to ask him even more dumb questions and he’d rather get it over with now. “Where’s Glenn?”

“He got called into work,” Rodrigue says, sitting back on the couch where he’s watching TV. There’s some weird C-drama on the screen with people arguing over food, so Rodrigue turns down the volume to give Felix his full attention. “There was some sort of emergency and they needed more people to help.” Felix gives a hum of acknowledgement and takes off his shoes, and he’s about to run upstairs to his room when his dad says, “Glenn is always working, it’s very admirable. I hope one day you can also get a job helping people. Or at least something you can be successful in.”

“ _ Okay, _ dad,” Felix groans again  — this is the same daily song and dance his father puts him through any time Glenn goes off to work. “I will.”

“You always say you will. Have you chosen your major yet? Figured out what you want to do?” 

“I’m working on it,” Felix grumbles. “It’s _ fine _ .”

“Felix, you’re always arguing, you’d make a great lawyer,” Rodrigue says, turning towards the TV. “It’d be nice to have a doctor and a lawyer in the family.” 

“Okay, dad,” is his response, once again. And before Rodrigue can tell him the usual: Don’t go to bed too late or else your body won’t grow, don’t you want to be as tall as Sylvain? Don’t eat anything, it's too late and it’s not healthy so close to bedtime, etc etc, Felix retreats upstairs and throws himself onto his bed. 

It’s been a day. 

* * *

Felix stares at himself in the mirror wearing a shirt he doesn’t recognize. An academy uniform: black vest, gold trim. Stray, uneven strands hang from his scalp, like a veil made of anger and grief. Rage. Sadness. Dark hair litters the sink — _his_ hair. 

Felix grips the edge of the sink, grip trembling, breaths heavy. Lightning dances in his eyes.

This is a dream. It has to be. 

Felix jolts awake. All he remembers from the dream is his voice echoing in his head. 

_ Never again, boar. Never again.  _


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing Felix does in the morning is check his phone; the next thing he does is send a “fuck off” to the group chat. His home screen is covered in notifications from “horse_ebooks” and “TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX” asking about his date with Dimitri.

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

hey, wait a minute, tell us about the date

**Jeff**

wasn’t a date

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

hook up?

**Jeff**

no fuck off

**horse_ebooks**

What did you guys do?

God, what the fuck _did_ they do last night? Nothing, really. They talked and drank and walked through the Blaiddyd weapons hall. Maybe Felix started to feel sick from the alcohol. Alcohol-induced déjà vu. Whatever that means.

It could explain the wild dreams he had last night. After the initial dream that woke him up, he had a few more after falling back asleep. Dreams that made him feel like he was there. Grabbing hold of a blue cape with white and black fur, remembering the way it felt, the way it smelled, the surge of emotions that went through his mind when he held the cape in his arms and turned it over to see blood. 

Was it his blood? Was it someone else’s blood? It had been raining in his dream, carrying away the trail of blood into a dark field… 

Felix shakes his head. A strange, sickly mix of warmth, hatred, and fear lingers in his chest. He can’t remember any point in his life when he’s felt this way before. He’s never truly hated anyone, and yet this feeling is so intense, like it’s been bottled up for years and is trying to explode out of him. It’s an odd feeling. He wonders what he actually dreamt of to make his brain freak out like that. 

Felix looks back down at his phone. Five hundred little chat bubbles are flying up on his phone from Ingrid and Sylvain asking for every detail of what he and Dimitri did, and Felix rolls his eyes. He picks up his phone to respond just as Aegis hops up on his lap and makes herself comfortable. He scowls, contorting himself around her to respond. His fingers tap the screen loudly, begrudgingly hammering out his responses to what they did, blah blah blah, whatever, boring, they hung out, his house is huge, the night was fine. 

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

omg. yes. get it fe!!

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

beautiful start of this budding relationship

**Jeff**

it’s not a relationship we just hung out

**horse_ebooks**

HE’S COURTING YOU LIKE SOME OLD NOBLE IT’S ROMANTIC

**Jeff**

we LITERALLY just drank and sat on the couch

Felix sighs and checks his other messages. There’s a good morning text from Dimitri. 

He tries not to smile. 

They hang out again in a few days. Dedue had excitedly messaged the group chat about a new cafe with Duscur cuisine, and after sampling it to make sure it passed muster, he wanted everyone to try it. They make plans to meet as soon as they can. 

Dimitri is running a little late, so everyone goes ahead and orders food. They leave most of the ordering to Dedue, of course — they know they’re in capable hands here and he’d order the best bites to introduce everyone properly. Various noodle soups, savory pies, stir fried vegetables, and so many other dishes of food glisten tantalizingly on other tables, and a savory delicious scent wafts through the air. Ingrid is drooling by the time their food hits the table. 

Dimitri is a full half hour late, which is not like him. He waves and takes a seat besides Felix, and looks pretty tired. Dark circles hang heavy below his eyes, and he muffles a yawn with the back of his hand. “Sorry everyone!” He smiles awkwardly. “I lost track of time.”

“You _look_ pretty tired!” Sylvain says, pointing out the obvious. “Busy schedule?”

“Ah, no, nothing like that.” Dimitri takes a sip of water. “Just not getting enough sleep.”

“Too busy working out, or something?” Felix offers. Dimitri looks up at him.

“Oh! Yes, actually. How did you know?” 

Felix blinks and then looks away and takes a sip of water. “Just a guess.” 

He turns away just in time to see a familiar face — the smiling, freckled face of his old coworker, Ashe, chatting with a nearby table. Felix hasn’t seen him since the restaurant job, so when Ashe looks over, he’s quick to make eye contact.

“Felix!” Ashe greets him happily. “It’s been a while! How are you?”

“Hey Ashe. I’ve been alright,” Felix replies. “Is this _your_ cafe?” 

“Yeah!” Ashe smiles happily. “I’m sure I told you back at the restaurant that I’ve always wanted one of my own. One of my best friends is from Duscur, so we decided to take a risk and open one up together. It’s been pretty fun so far!”

“Oh, no wonder the food tastes so authentic,” Dedue says. “I’m also from Duscur. I’m pretty impressed.”

“That’s a hefty compliment!” Ashe says with a bright grin. “It’s been really great to follow a dream. I’ve learned so much about Duscur cooking, too! Oh, I’m Ashe, by the way.”

“I’m Dedue,” he introduces himself, “and these are my friends Dimitri, Sylvain, Ingrid, and Felix.” Dedue goes on to chat more with Ashe, and Ashe is clearly interested in hearing more about Duscur by the way he’s engaging so enthusiastically with Dedue, an excited smile nearly bursting off his face alongside a tint of blush on his cheeks — so Felix takes this moment to look at Dimitri as his leg hits against his. 

“You look tired too,” Dimitri says quietly, not to disturb Dedue and Ashe’s chat. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Felix replies quickly. “Bad dreams, that’s all.” 

It’s a half-truth, but he’s not about to tell Dimitri about his nightmares. They’ve been getting worse lately. It seems like he sees the same sight of a tall blonde man every time he falls asleep, his armored hand gripping a lance. The man faces away from Felix most times, but he turned around last night — only to reveal these strikingly bright blue eyes. They haunt Felix like a shadow following him around every corner. A glimpse of something, or even someone, who was once there… 

And if it’s not the dreams, it’s the awful déjà vu he keeps getting at random times whenever he’s awake. Whatever it is, he’s starting to feel really tired of it. 

Felix pushes the thoughts out of his mind. He isn’t going to let some bad dreams ruin his day. 

Everyone has a nice rest of their meal, and Sylvain hypes Dedue up into asking for Ashe’s phone number. Dedue doesn’t, but Ashe writes it on the receipt anyway after discounting a few items, so it’s a pretty successful day.

That night, Felix lies in bed and stares at the ceiling and tries not to text Dimitri. 

Felix picks up his phone with his free hand and stares at the lock screen. He could text Dimitri, but what would he say? He wants to see him? Ugh. He’s thinking about him? Ew. How are you? Awful. I miss you? Worse! Embarrassing! 

Aegis purrs beside him, nuzzling into his hand. 

His phone lights up the second Felix decides not to bother sending Dimitri a text. 

**DIMITRI**

Hello, Felix

**DIMITRI**

I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately

**FELIX**

hey

**FELIX**

cool

**DIMITRI**

Would you like to hang out tomorrow? 

Felix texts back a yes before he can even think about whether or not he actually has plans. It’s good that he doesn’t, but he has to remind himself to slow down. 

They decide to see a movie the next day after dinner. It’s some action flick Felix has been wanting to see for a while, but neither Sylvain nor Ingrid seemed interested in. 

Felix goes to bed that night with a small smile on his face, feeling like his heart could leap out of his chest at any moment. The second his head hits the pillow, he realizes: “Fuck, is this a date?” 

* * *

The movie was exactly what Felix wanted to see: ridiculous action and explosions and wild fight scenes, barely any plot and certainly no romance. There was a single kiss between the main characters. Felix almost missed it when Dimitri’s hand brushed against his leg. 

Dimitri had initially shied away from the contact, muttering “Oh, sorry, these chairs are so small…” Which worked the first time, but not the second. Or the third. Felix had had half a mind to just grab Dimitri’s hand and place it right on his thigh if that’s where it was trying to be. 

Dimitri smiles as he listens to Felix chatter about a scene that really captured his attention as they walk out of the theater. They pass by a few street food stands. One of them has a few delicious looking meat skewers on display, and Dimitri picks his head up when the salty smell wafts over. 

“The skewers over there look tasty,” Dimitri points out, gesturing to the food stand. “Would you like some dessert?” 

“Meat skewers? For dessert?” Felix asks, but he wants them anyway.

“Well, I would suggest an ice cream place, but I know you don’t like sweets.”

“I’ve never told you that.” 

“Um…” Dimitri trails off, frowning. 

There’s a pause.

“Actually, I’m not sure, maybe Sylvain or Ingrid told me? I don’t remember having that conversation with them, but… I must have.” He looks away, his lips pressed together tightly like he’s thinking, and goes to buy Felix a few skewers to snack on. 

Dimitri offers to drive him home, so Felix hops into his swanky sports car. The street lights are bright and golden in the darkness of the night. Dimitri starts talking about how he liked the movie, that he’s glad Felix enjoyed it, and what he did with his day. It was uneventful except for the date, but even listening to Dimitri talk about what he ate for breakfast and how many push ups he tried to do together was interesting. Ugh, Felix can’t even bring himself to be horrified at the thought. 

They end up taking the long way back, a nice long night drive, because neither of them want to go home. Dimitri’s hand finds Felix’s, and his palm is balmy and he pulls it back like it was an accident. Just like he did in the movie theater. Felix rolls his eyes and grabs it before Dimitri can fully pull it away. 

It’s nice — relaxing, even, listening to Dimitri talk and holding his hand and feeling _wanted_. It’s nice. It’s comfortable. 

Eventually Felix asks Dimitri to drop him off before his dad can ask where he is. They pull up into the driveway, but Felix lingers anyway: he doesn’t want to get out. He’s still holding onto Dimitri’s hand. 

“I…” Felix trails off and looks at their hands. Dimitri squeezes his hand gently. “I’ll see you later.”

Dimitri responds quietly. “Yes, I hope you have a good night, Felix.” 

Felix looks up to hold Dimitri’s gaze. The moment feels frozen in time, as if it was such a terrible chore for Felix to have to leave.

Dimitri leans in. Felix meets him halfway. 

The kiss is sweet and chaste and extremely quick, and Felix pulls away just enough to stare, like he’s going to say something important, mouth scrambling to find the start of words, but all he manages is a hurried, “Th-thanks, bye,” before scrambling out. His hand feels a bit cold without Dimitri’s fingers wrapped around his. Empty. He waves awkwardly to convey that he wasn’t upset at the kiss, and then makes his mad dash inside.

The group chat is already buzzing with eyes emojis and question marks asking how the date went. Felix groans. His friends might as well know. 

**Jeff**

ugh. we kissed

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**horse_ebooks**

Sylvain, calm down

**horse_ebooks**

Good for you, though! It’s about time.

Felix throws his phone across the room. He doesn’t want to talk about it right now, especially not when it’s so fresh. Dimitri’s lips felt really... _nice_ against his, so smooth and soft and gentle, and he’s a bit taken aback by just how good he feels about it. This isn’t Felix’s first kiss, but none of his previous experiences felt anything close to this. Even just this quick, chaste kiss feels so weirdly _right_ and, well, Felix has to be overthinking things. 

He walks over to pick up his phone and scrolls through the ridiculous text messages from his friends, answering a few of them before he gets a text from Dimitri. 

**DIMITRI**

Made it home! Luckily, there was no traffic on the roads. Hope your night is well!

**FELIX**

yeah, good

**FELIX**

thanks

**FELIX**

i had a good time

**DIMITRI**

I did as well. We should do this again, if that’s okay. I’d love to see you again.

**FELIX**

yea definitely

Felix goes to bed before he can think any more about how he’d like to kiss Dimitri again. 

* * *

Dimitri is sitting on the couch in Felix’s room and absolutely crushing him in Smash Bros., which is actually impressive. Felix is usually the one crushing Sylvain and Ingrid (and Ingrid absolutely _pulverizes_ Sylvain), so it’s a fun change of pace to be the one kept on his toes. 

Felix had invited Dimitri over a few hours ago, most of which was spent talking to Rodrigue and answering the awful, awkward questions of “Where did you go to school? What were your grades like? What do you like to do? What are your hobbies? Are you really a Blaiddyd?” before Felix yanked Dimitri away from the interrogation and into his room. He’d closed the door, but his father had not-so-subtly opened it by a crack when he “happened” to walk by. So Felix got up and closed his door again. Sure enough, Rodrigue passed by again and opened it. It was infuriating, this song and dance.

And it’s especially infuriating because every time Felix thinks about how much he wants to kiss Dimitri, failing to squash back his urge and constantly sneaking glances at how muscular he is, he hears the door crack open again. What’s worse, Dimitri keeps looking back at him like maybe he’s feeling the same way too, giving him the same look he did just before he kissed him in the car, and the second Felix thinks he’s going to lean in and kiss him, who walks in but Mrs. Fraldarius with a plate of fruit! Slices of apples and oranges are arranged in a neat pattern on the plate. She offers it with a knowing smile.

The lack of privacy! The fruit is tasty, but the lack of privacy is horrible! 

“Do you want to… go somewhere else?” Dimitri asks awkwardly, as if he’s not sure if he should offer this and be too forward, but the Fraldariuses are playing a rousing game of “bother our son” musical chairs and his earnest expression implies he wants to make a few more moves on Felix alone. 

They decide to get coffee.

It’s not quite “alone,” but at least they aren’t being interrupted.

Dimitri takes a seat beside Felix with a black coffee and slides Felix his unsweetened iced soy latte. Felix raises a brow. “No cream or sugar?”

Dimitri shrugs. “Oh, yes. My tastebuds are slightly messed up so it doesn’t make a whole lot of difference to me.” 

“Huh. That’s weird.” Felix takes a sip of his drink. “Hey, did you play the Fire Emblem game with the two different countries and the two royal families were your siblings?”

“Oh, Fates, yes, why?”

“Did you play the DLC?” Felix swirls around the ice in his drink to mix up the drink a bit more. “It explained why the three Awakening characters were in it, but I don’t even know why they bothered adding them in the first place.”

“I like those characters, so I didn’t mind.” Dimitri smiles. “So we’ve converted you into a Fire Emblem fan?”

Felix takes another sip. “It’s whatever,” he says quickly, not wanting to give away how much he’s been enjoying playing through the franchise at lightning speed. “Anyway, there’s a cool weapon in that game that looked similar to something I saw at your place. In your fancy weapons hall.”

“Oh, did you want to see it again?” Dimitri asks, and laughs when Felix absolutely invites himself over. For the weapon, he swears. Dimitri cracks a pleased smile. 

It’s cute. Ugh.

Dimitri happily leads him home, but they don’t even end up making it to the weapons hall — Felix gets distracted talking about video games and they end up in Dimitri’s room instead, Felix going through Dimitri’s game stash. 

“I have more at home,” Dimitri says, sitting on his bed to watch Felix from the other side of the room. It’s a big room, almost _too_ big, really. There’s a lot of empty space that Dimitri hasn’t quite figured out how to fill. Then again, it is a vacation home. “I only brought the few I thought I’d play.” 

Felix comments on the games, ones he’s played, ones he hasn’t played, ones he’d _like_ to play, before Dimitri gets his attention with an extremely meek, “Um, F-Felix?” 

Felix looks over and sets the games down. “What’s up?”

“Do you, um,” Dimitri takes a deep breath like he needs to steady himself. “Do you want to… Would it be alright with you if we kissed?” 

Felix is across the room and on the bed immediately. 

“Ugh, yes,” he admits, a little too quickly. He hopes Dimitri can’t feel the drumming in his chest through his lips as obviously as he can hear it through the ringing in his ears. Dimitri’s lips are just as soft as they were last time, and this time Felix can really slow down and appreciate them. Dimitri gingerly places his hands on Felix’s back, his touch tentative like he has no idea where to put them right now. Felix doesn’t know either, so he just lets him touch his shoulders and let his hands wander along his back. Felix attempts to mirror a few of his movements. He’s not really sure what to do here and right now is _really_ hoping Dimitri knows a bit more than he does.

Dimitri’s fingertips glide along the waistband of Felix’s pants, and Felix tenses up, a sudden panic washing over him for a split second and leaving him with nervous adrenaline.

_Fuck, no, wait a minute._

Felix is quick to swat the hands away, his heart skips a beat, anxious. Felix tries not to break the kiss, tries to make sure Dimitri understands that he doesn’t want him to stop kissing him, and holds his face close by the back of his neck, nails massaging his scalp. It earns a low hum of acknowledgement from Dimitri, and he keeps his hands above the belt, resting them gently on Felix’s side.

Dimitri hesitantly slips his tongue past Felix’s lips. It sends a tingle down Felix’s spine, and he shivers in Dimitri’s arms as Dimitri pulls him onto his lap. Felix’s arms rest around Dimitri’s neck, pulling him closer. 

Felix is starting to get the feeling that Dimitri might be just as inexperienced as himself: sexploring together feels natural. Dimitri pulls away, and Felix bites his bottom lip watching him take off his shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the floor. Dimitri’s chest is all beautifully sculpted muscle. Felix reaches out to touch his pecs, fingers running across tight skin. He trails his palms down Dimitri’s arms — he’s so damn _strong_ and _hot_ , Felix’s mind is racing at how badly he wants to see more of him, _touch_ more of him, maybe even _taste_ more of him. Felix has half a mind to take his shirt off too, but the uneasy distaste that grows in the pit of his stomach at the thought is quick to convince him otherwise. There’s no way Dimitri _didn’t_ feel his binder under his shirt while he was caressing his back, and it’s not like Felix thinks he’s going to care, but he also doesn’t know, and the unknown is what’s making him uneasy.

Felix grimaces at his own thoughts. No, enough spiraling. Back to the matter at hand. 

He has his palm tentatively sliding down Dimitri’s abs and the muscle is rock solid against his fingers. Felix’s apprehension is replaced with something warmer — curiosity, maybe. Desire.

Dimitri nudges Felix to lie down, relax. Take things a step further. 

The door swings open. A girl around their age walks into the room.

“Hey Dimitri, have you seen my—” 

The intruder has light brown hair tossed into a lazy ponytail, and startling purple eyes. Felix pulls away in a panic. Her expression remains neutral, unphased. “Oh, sorry. Didn’t realize you were with someone. Dimitri, have you seen my headphones?” 

“Uh…” Dimitri stumbles over his words. “N-no. Did you try your pants pockets?”

“Ugh, did I leave them in there again?” She slams the door closed, and Felix hears a muffled “Sorry!” from the other side of the door. 

An excruciating silence hangs in the air like a thick fog.

“Th-that was, um,” Dimitri tries, “My stepsister… Edelgard…”

“Okay…” Felix says slowly, sliding off his lap. “I’m gonna go…”

“W-wait, really?” Dimitri asks, sounding dismayed and watching Felix gather his things with a frown. “Don’t leave yet, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault,” Felix grumbles, more annoyed at the fact that today seems to be “no privacy anywhere” day than anything else. A part of him is, admittedly, a little relieved, if only to give him a moment to think about what just happened. “Just gonna clear my head.”

“Ah, I understand.” 

Dimitri shoulders droop and he frowns as he walks him out the door, and something about the way he looks at him as Felix walks away hits strangely. It feels like déjà vu again, and Felix is starting to get _tired_ of these feelings. They tug at his heart and nag at his memories, like something is trying to tell him to stay, not to go, or maybe that he’s walked away from Dimitri before when he never wanted to. It’s a muddled mix of feelings he can’t quite piece together, not concrete enough to figure out on its own, let alone individually — only that the very feeling of walking away from Dimitri feels… weird.

It’s just _weird_.

* * *

Dimitri watches Felix walk out and shuts the front door once he’s out of sight. Edelgard pokes her head out from the other room. “I didn’t know you were seeing someone,” she says casually, lifting her head from her phone to make the statement before looking back down and typing something. 

“It’s a casual thing. We’re... not really anything.” Dimitri scratches the back of his head. “I think.”

“He knows you’re leaving at the end of the summer, right?” Edelgard reminds him, giving her phone a final tap as the sent message sound effect plays. She must be sending a text. Or a few of them, given how long she’d been looking at her phone. 

“Well, I did tell him that when we first met.” Dimitri shuffles awkwardly, and goes to sit down in the living room instead of continuing to stand around in the entryway. 

“Have I met him before? He looks a little familiar.” Edelgard follows him into the room only to pull out the cold beers she’d just bought. Before Dimitri can reply with a “No, I don’t think so.” Edelgard plows ahead and asks, “Do you have plans? I invited everyone over, so if you’re going to be around, ask Dedue if he wants to join us.”

Dimitri sighs and pulls out his phone. 

* * *

“So… what’s up?” Claude asks Dimitri after a lull in a conversation. He’s sitting on the large couch in the Blaiddyd living room, leaning back with his arms behind his head, a sly half-smile gracing his features. “I hear you’re seeing someone.” 

Dimitri looks up from where he sits on the other couch across from him. Claude and Hilda stare right at him, waiting patiently for his response. Edelgard sits next to Hubert, too busy on her phone to really engage in the conversation other than a “Oh really?” and a “That’s interesting.” every now and then. 

Dimitri turns his head to look hopefully, and maybe pleadingly, at Dedue sitting next to him to save him from this conversation. Dedue just shrugs. Dimitri turns back to Claude with a matching gesture. 

“Um… Well, I suppose? But it’s complicated.” _How_ did Claude know about something that happened only hours ago? 

“His name is Felix and I caught them making out today,” Edelgard says, deadpan, still not looking up from her phone. “He seems... Nice.” 

“El!” Dimitri’s voice breaks at his exclamation, and he clears his throat. “It’s just for the summer. I think. I don’t know.” 

“He is… an amusing character,” Dedue adds, raising a brow. “We’ve hung out several times now. His friend group is very nice. Strange characters, but nice.” 

“Aww, that’s sweet,” Hilda coos. “It’s nice to hear Dimitri is finally experiencing a summer fling. Especially since you’re always listening to us talk about ours.”

“We all listen to _you_ talk about _yours_ , Hilda,” Claude laughs, and lets Hilda give him a playful shove. “So, Felix, huh? Strong name — Felix and Dimitri, power couple~!” 

“Again, it’s just a summer thing,” Dimitri mumbles. “Maybe, I don’t know.”

“Do you like him?” Hilda asks, crossing her legs. “Maybe long distance can work. He knows you’re leaving at the end of the summer, right?”

“I’ve been telling him that,” Edelgard says from her corner. “Felix definitely knows.” 

“This really isn’t all that interesting, I promise.” Dimitri blushes. “What were we talking about before this? Didn’t I ask you about how your summers were going?” 

“Yeah, and then we listened to Hilda talk about all the guys she’s been ghosting after they take her out and pay for her food and drinks,” Claude says. “And that reminded me I wanted to ask you about your whirlwind summer romance. So when can we meet him?” 

“I don’t think… I mean, it’s not that I don’t want you to meet him, it’s just…” Dimitri sighs. “He can be prickly.”

“He’s weird, yeah,” Edelgard says, still tapping away at her phone.

“You _only_ know him from walking in on us,” Dimitri grumbles under his breath. 

“So is that your type? Weird?” Hilda giggles. “Is Hubert not weird enough for you?”

“Ha. Very funny,” Hubert laughs dryly, and that’s all he says. He looks mildly distracted by Edelgard's phone — he'll appear to get ready to say something, his mouth opens just as her phone vibrates about five times in rapid succession, and he'll lean back against the couch again in silence. Edelgard lets out an impatient huff at her latest barrage of texts and finally puts her phone face down on her thigh.

“Damn, El, who’s blowing up your phone like that?” Claude finally asks what everyone was thinking, and Edelgard rolls her eyes. 

“No one important, it’s fine,” she replies dismissively. “Just someone really annoying.” 

“Aw, come on, Ferdinand isn’t that bad.” Hilda smiles at her knowingly. “He just likes you.”

“He does _not_ like me,” Edelgard replies, crossing her arms as her phone starts to buzz again. “Not like that, anyway.”

“Do you know for sure?” Hilda raises a brow. “He’s _always_ texting you. When are you just gonna invite him to hang out with us? You can bring Ferdinand and Dimitri can bring Felix! It’ll be a party!” 

“That’s different. I’m not dating Ferdinand.” Edelgard leans back, and then exchanges a look with Hubert. “But I can consider bringing him to hang out with us if you want to meet him.”

“Just be prepared to listen to him talk about absolutely nothing for hours,” Hubert adds under his breath. 

“Sometimes he’s funny,” Edelgard says, unable to ignore the buzzing any longer and picking up her phone again. She forces back a smile. “But yes, mostly annoying.” 

“Well we can host a party or something. Make it fun! I already have some ideas,” Hilda offers, picking up her phone to scroll through whatever social media app was sending her notifications. “We can invite Ferdinand and Felix and whoever else you guys wanna meet. I wanna meet all your summer flings.”

“Ferdinand is not my summer fling!” Edelgard huffs again.

“Oh yeah, he’s just obsessed with you cause he _totally_ doesn’t like you.” Hilda rolls her eyes, “I know how guys are, El.”

“Ugh, just— meet him and you’ll understand.” 

Dimitri sits back and doesn’t interrupt. Maybe if he lets Hilda and Edelgard continue to go at it, they’ll all forget about asking him about Felix. He exchanges glances with Dedue. Dedue blinks back, just as lost. 

Finally, Claude clears his throat. 

“So… okay, _hypothetically_ if you guys had some sweet summer romances you wanted to keep up, do you think you’d do, like, long distance? Video calls exist. I’m sure you can, yknow,” Claude lazily makes a weird but lewd jerk off gesture with one hand, “together and all, walk yourselves through it. It’s possible.”

“Is that speaking from experience?” Hubert smirks at him devilishly with a tilt of his head, but Claude only shrugs. 

“So what if it is?” he says, batting his eyelashes at Hubert in response. “Everyone in this room fucks.” 

Everyone gets quiet. Dimitri decides the only way to make the moment less awkward is to just talk about Felix. 

“Well, anyway,” he begins, and a wave of relief washes over everyone as they no longer have to scramble to find a conversation topic that isn’t about fucking.. “I like Felix. He likes video games and swords. He’s, um, he’s a Fraldarius, actually. Like the Faerghus legends.” 

“What does that mean?” Hilda stage whispers to Claude, who smiles. 

“It means you don’t pay enough attention in school,” he explains. “The Fraldarius family was like the super cool swordsman family that protected the Blaiddyd royals back in the day.”

“Oh, well that’s why I don’t know.” Hilda crosses her arms. “I haven’t taken a history class in years, and when I did we just learned about Leicester history. I don’t know anything about Faerghus history or royal families or whatever.” 

“Yeah, the Fraldarius were the Blaiddyd’s shields, right? Right hand men and all.” Claude gives him a vague hand wave. “That’s fitting that you guys found each other.” 

“Destiny!” Hilda giggles, “That’s romantic.” 

“Oh, no he doesn’t believe in that kind of thing,” Dimitri says, a bit bashfully. “Sometimes I’ll joke that meeting him is fate or something, and he’ll just scoff at me and say it’s just a coincidence. It’s quite… strange. I’m not entirely sure why he’s so against such a harmless concept, so I try not to mention it too much.” 

“Well, I used to not believe in that kind of thing, but then I met all of you and, I mean, let’s be real here,” Hilda says, leaning forward. “I know enough history to know that all of our last names are related in _some_ way.”

“Historically, the Vestra family was brought up to serve the Hresvelgs as their vassals,” Hubert says, “but I don’t think it’s any nonsense or _fate_ drawing me to Edelgard.”

“So you think it’s just a total coincidence that the Blaiddyds and the Hresvelgs, the two major families of Fódlan, are in this room together along with the Hresvelg vassal and a mention of the Fraldarius hookup?” Claude asks with a teasing lilt. “What’s Ferdinand’s last name?”

“Aegir. And before you say it, yes, I know it was a very prominent name in Adrestia back in the day.” Edelgard frowns. “But do _not_ ask him about his name. He is very proud of it and I am very tired.”

“Riegan is also a major name in Leicester, isn’t it? As is Goneril?” Dedue asks, turning his attention to Claude, who shrugs. “I seem to be the only one here without an important last name,” he says light-heartedly, laughing. “It’s fascinating you’re all in the same room together like this, considering I believe at some point all of your families were at war for Fodlan.”

“Yeah, who won that war, anyway?” Hilda asks.

“Faerghus,” says Dimitri, just as Edelgard says “Adrestia” and Claude says “the Alliance.”

They stare at each other, mouths gaping in shock.

Hilda interrupts her Twitter scroll to offer her sage advice once again. 

“Anyway, not here to pressure you or anything, but date Felix if you’re feeling it. I feel like you’re always by yourself whenever we hang out.” 

“I’m not alone, Dedue is here,” Dimitri protests, and Dedue smiles at him reassuringly, but then says, 

“You know what she means, Dimitri.” 

“You all get on _my_ case about everything I do, so all I’m saying is that it’s nice to see you happy, Dima.” Hilda says this without even looking up, her attention still on her phone. 

“I’m just not sure how I want to… ask him out?” Dimitri asks quietly. “Not that… you all need to know my issues and I’m not asking for advice, all I’m saying is—”

“Just tell him you like him and you want to try a long distance relationship,” Edelgard says flatly, back to (maybe, possibly) texting Ferdinand. “You have to talk about everything, though. It won’t work if you don’t communicate, so I hope he’s good at talking.”

“He’s, well, sometimes he is,” Dimitri says, leaning back against the couch. His gaze settles on the forgotten beers they’ve all been nursing throughout the night, the condensation dripping perfect circles around the cans on the table. “Sometimes he acts a bit strange, though.”

“How so?”

“Sometimes he says he feels like the things we do are… familiar? But I don’t mean he’s experienced these things with someone else. He explains it like a déjà vu, or a dream, or… I don’t know, something like that?” he says quietly. “And the only reason I’m inclined to believe it’s something serious is that I’ve been feeling the same way too. Ever since I met him it’s like something is trying to tell me something.”

“Uhh… like, what, a past life, or something?” Hilda looks incredulous, probably isn’t taking this seriously, but she’s humoring him, so at least there’s that.

“Who knows what exists,” Claude says — he sounds like he’s dismissing the thought by the uninterested tone in his voice, but he’s looking right at Dimitri with a raised brow when he says this, as if waiting for Dimitri to continue with more details. “If our past lives were trying to tell us something, that’d be pretty funny. Maybe that’s why we’re all in the same room together. Destiny, oooooo~” He waves his hands mockingly like he’s trying to be mysterious, or maybe to sound like a ghost. 

“Does anyone really believe in that kind of thing?” Hubert asks, but his tone makes it sound like it’s a statement instead. “Reincarnation?”

“Who can say,” Edelgard says distantly. “Either way, it doesn’t matter what our past lives did. The only thing that matters is what we do with our lives now.”

Dimitri nods. “I agree, but—” 

“Just ask him out, Dima,” Edelgard cuts him off and rolls her eyes. “I know that’s what you want to hear, so I’m telling you now.”

Dimitri swallows nervously. Just ask him out, huh?

* * *

It’s a few days after their impromptu date — makeout sessions — whatever, and Felix is lounging across Dimitri’s couch in the den with the bar. They’ve already had a couple of drinks. Felix is wearing Dimitri’s oversized sweatshirt after it got too cold in the den and Dimitri couldn’t figure out how to turn down the air conditioning. This is not the important part. 

The important part is that Dimitri is wearing grey sweatpants that are tight enough they outline every inch of Dimitri’s dick, and tipsy Felix has been thinking about this for the last several hours. He wonders if Dimitri has caught on by now that Felix is physically _straining_ his gaze up away from below the belt so he doesn’t get caught staring. It’s turned into an extremely hard game. 

They’ve been kissing on the couch for a while now and it’s starting to creep further and further into something heavier as Dimitri gets over him on the couch. Felix runs a finger through Dimitri’s hair, nails scratching gently at his scalp, and Dimitri lets out a groan when Felix bites at his lower lip. Dimitri’s hands wander south, slowly, almost experimentally. Felix feels himself tensing up a bit under his palms, and Dimitri seems to catch on and keeps his hands where he knows Felix is comfortable. He pulls away, long enough to smile down at Felix, and pokes his nose with the tip of his. 

“Do you want a drink?”

Felix leans up to give him another kiss, hums against his lips. “No.”

“Do you… want to keep going?” Dimitri asks slowly. This above-the-belt heavy petting is as far as they’ve gotten, and each time it’s become more and more obvious that both of them want to go further, but nerves get the better of them. 

At the question, Felix hesitates. His eyes dart to the corner of the room, “Uhh… well,” he starts quietly. “I do. Yes,” he says, and then pats Dimitri’s shoulder as a cue for Dimitri to get off him. Dimitri pulls off him and Felix slides back to sit up. “I just need to tell you something first.”

“Oh, there’s, um — of course, yes, I’m here, I’m listening,” Dimitri responds. “I also have to tell you something. You go first, though!”

Felix feels his heart pounding in his chest, and he hopes it’s not as audible from across the couch as he thinks it is. But he has to tell Dimitri eventually. He just hopes he knows Dimitri as well as he thinks he does. 

“Okay, fine. Um. I’m trans. I don’t know what else to say about it. If that’s something you’re, I don’t know, disappointed about? I’ll leave.”

Dimitri blinks at him. “Oh! Of course! I don’t have… anything comparable to say to that. I’m a Sagittarius?”

What.

_What._

There’s a silence.

“...I… I’m...a Pisces, I think.” Felix responds after a moment of silence. They’re both staring at each other like idiots. Dimitri grabs his phone to type something. “So you’re fine? Everything’s okay?”

“Of course, why would I have a problem with that?” Dimitri responds, and then shows him his phone screen. He’s looked up Sagittarius-Pisces zodiac compatibility. Some immediate highlights that stand out from a cursory glance are high attraction, average sex, _terrible_ communication — Felix stops reading and narrows his eyes in distaste. He doesn’t need a bunch of shitty _stars_ telling him how to talk to his crush.

“Is this a reputable website?” Dimitri asks, voice sounding earnest and curious.

Ugh. 

Felix’s phone vibrates, so since Dimitri is scrolling through astrology dot com, Felix checks his messages.

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

have u guys boned yet?

**Jeff**

he’s a sagittarius 

**horse_ebooks**

What does that mean

**Jeff**

idk

**TACO BELL DOUBLE CHALUPA EXTREME CRAVINGS BOX**

???????????

“I don’t know anything about astrology or horoscopes,” Felix says with a huff, putting his phone down on the small coffee table when his friends are vastly unhelpful. After he says this, Dimitri mirrors him and puts his phone down as well. Felix sits back against the couch again and shifts, trying to get comfortable.

“It’s all bullshit anyway — it’s stupid to think that your personality and decisions can be written in the stars.”

“I think it can be comforting sometimes to feel like there’s a reason for who you are and the way you think and act,” Dimitri says with a smile. “I take it you don’t believe in fate, then?”

“Ha!” Felix laughs out loud. “Do I look like I believe in fate?”

“I don’t know, do you?”

“No such thing as fate. I make my own path.” 

“What if your path was made for you?” Dimitri asks, as Felix crawls back over to him and swings his legs over his lap. Dimitri places his hand on Felix’s thigh. “A past life, perhaps, trying to get you to make up for its past mistakes?”

“That’s past me’s problem,” Felix responds, cozying up on Dimitri’s lap. “Are you saying you believe in, what, reincarnation? That’s stupid.”

“Okay, Felix.” Dimitri’s other hand snakes its way around to palm at Felix’s lower back, and then disappears up his shirt to touch Felix’s bare skin. His fingers are warm. “But maybe we _have_ met in a past life.”

“We met because you couldn’t shut up about a painting,” Felix says, tilting his head and looking pointedly at Dimitri’s lips, like doing so might summon kisses. “Coincidence, nothing more.”

Dimitri hums, staring back at him. “Coincidence, then,” he says, leaning in close to Felix. “Just to remind you of this _coincidence_ , I am only here for the summer.” 

Felix gives him a kiss, and then bites Dimitri’s bottom lip. “Better make the most of it then.” 

Dimitri pulls his entire weight on top of him so Felix is straddling his lap. Felix lets Dimitri pull the borrowed sweatshirt off him as he starts unbuttoning Dimitri’s shirt, hands finding Dimitri’s bare skin and the tight muscles of his chest. They’re quick to fall back into another progressively heavy makeout session, with less and less clothes as they go on, until Dimitri is only wearing his sweatpants and Felix is down to his underwear and shirt. 

“So, um,” Dimitri’s wavering voice seems suddenly out of place given the mood. “What do you want to do?”

Felix bites his lip. “I… don’t know?”

“Is everything okay?” Dimitri looks concerned.

“Ugh.” Felix looks frustrated. “I’ve… never done this before.”

Dimitri sits back. “Huh?”

“What do you mean, ‘huh’?” 

“I mean, you’re so attractive— I just maybe thought you’d have some experience in… in this sort of thing,” Dimitri stammers out, and then immediately feels foolish.

“Oh,” is all Felix says. “You think I’m attractive?”

“O-of course?” Dimitri replies. They’re both red now. They look away from each other. 

“Uh. Cool,” Felix says in response. He’s going to really hate himself later for that reply. But for now, he’s going to let Dimitri push him down onto his back against the couch cushions. 

“What are you comfortable with?” Dimitri asks, after Felix lets him slide between his legs. Felix swallows. He’s honestly not really sure — he knows what _he_ likes, sure, but he’s never explored that with someone else before, and he’s mentally going back and forth between wanting to do that now, or waiting a bit now that he knows Dimitri is comfortable with him.

“What do _you_ want to do?” Felix asks back, which doesn’t answer Dimitri’s question, so Dimitri looks like he’s thinking for a moment. 

“Can I… touch you?” Dimitri finally asks, once it seems like he’s found the words. 

“Yes.” Felix decides it’s okay to experiment a little bit farther tonight. “Just don’t touch my chest.”

“Okay.” Dimitri starts kissing his neck, and Felix’s breath catches at the feeling of Dimitri’s teeth and tongue against his skin. Dimitri’s hands rub at Felix’s sides, his stomach, his legs, and Dimitri slides himself down so he can kiss at his stomach. “Is this okay?” 

“Yes,” Felix says breathily, spreading his legs wider so Dimitri has enough room to kiss down his torso, and then down his thigh. 

“Tell me if anything gets uncomfortable, okay?” Dimitri says, wanting to check in, but Felix just combs his fingers through his hair and nods. 

“You’re fine,” he says, so Dimitri’s finger gently touches Felix through his underwear. Just the smallest amount of friction has Felix letting out a little gasp, so Dimitri starts with slow, tentative circles and watches Felix’s reaction. It feels good. Felix lets him know through gentle moans. 

Dimitri keeps his pace but steadily applies more pressure, and Felix chokes back a pleasured sigh. His fingers grab at Dimitri’s hair as if to encourage him, and once Dimitri finds an angle that feels _really_ good, Felix bites his lip and tosses his head back to sigh Dimitri’s name. It’s just about to make him want to see how far they can get tonight when Felix’s phone starts vibrating. Felix tries to ignore it. It doesn’t stop. 

“Ugh,” Felix growls under his breath. “Ignore it.” But his phone keeps going off, rattling against the wooden coffee table like it’s going to explode if he doesn’t check his messages _right now_.

Felix growls and sits up in frustration. 

He grabs his stupid phone, only to see useless messages from his friends being menaces in the group chat. Ugh. Felix slides away from Dimitri. “Sorry,” he says. “These idiots.” 

The annoying vibrating, admittedly, pulled him out of the mood and ruined it for him. He feels a little bad, but more frustrated at himself. And just when it was starting to get good. 

Dimitri chuckles and sits back up. Felix looks over and _holy hell_ — he has a clear shot of Dimitri’s erection in his sweatpants’ captivity. It’s big. A barely contained monster. Dimitri must finally notice Felix staring, because he pulls over a couch pillow to cover his crotch. “Uh, don’t worry about me.” 

“...Do you want me to try getting you off?” Felix puts his phone on silent and places it face down on the table. 

“Oh! Only if you want to,” Dimitri says, and then clears his throat nervously. “If you feel comfortable with that.” 

“I mean, you know I’ve never tried before,” Felix says. “As long as you don’t mind.”

“Not at all!” He moves the throw pillow to the side. Something about the simple motion is cute. “Where do you want me?”

“Right there is fine, I guess.” Felix gets on his knees in between Dimitri’s legs, and Dimitri shuffles his pants down until he can free his dick. It springs up in front of Felix’s face, and his brows shoot up. 

“Wow.”

Dimitri remains quiet when Felix’s fingers curl around his cock and begins to stroke it at a gradual pace. Dimitri has to adjust his angle and pressure a few times, shyly gentle feedback to encourage Felix, but he’s definitely not _bad_ at it. Dimitri closes his eyes and sighs in pleasure, his hips bucking into Felix’s hand a few times like instinct, like he wants more. One hand finds the back of Felix’s head, fingers running through dark blue hair, nails dragging across his scalp. The touch sends a tingle down Felix’s spine, and he hums around Dimitri’s dick. 

“Ah, Felix…” Dimitri groans, voice low and husky. Felix feels Dimitri’s cock twitching in his hand. 

The front door slams shut. He hears the click-clack of heels walking through the foyer.

Ugh, Edelgard must be home. 

Dimitri and Felix stop what they’re doing and look at each other, both looking slightly panicked, and then Dimitri’s frown concedes defeat, shoulders sagging as he lets out a long sigh. Felix is annoyed, brows knit tight. The mood is once again ruined, and neither of them have gotten off.

“Maybe we should just… hang out tonight,” Dimitri says, finally, hiking back up his sweatpants. Felix goes to collect his clothes. 

“Yeah. Uh, yeah.” Felix isn’t quite sure what else to say. Dimitri lies down on the couch on his side and pats the empty space in front of him, so Felix lies down to let Dimitri spoon him. 

“Sorry,” Dimitri starts. “We tried?”

“Yeah,” Felix says, and then gets quiet. The feeling of Dimitri’s heavy arm around him is nice, almost like a weighted blanket. It’s safe in his arms. “So, you’ll be heading back home soon?”

“Yes. The last few weeks have truly been a whirlwind.” Dimitri chuckles, and Felix can feel the vibrations of his laugh from his chest against his back. “I’ll be back next summer, though.”

“Okay.” 

“Would you… be interested in anything while I’m away?” Dimitri asks carefully, like he has to, biting his lip at the possibilities of Felix’s answer though he knows Felix can’t see it. 

“Like, what, a long distance relationship?” 

“We don’t have to call it anything if you don’t want to,” he says. “Just… something?” He pulls Felix closer by the waist and kisses the back of his neck. “I’ll miss you.”

Felix hums, low and thoughtful. “So no labels, just whatever happens,” he says, like he’s trying to make sure they’re both on the same page.

“Yes! I won’t make you wait around for me,” Dimitri laughs. “Whatever happens, happens. Is that alright?” 

“Yeah.” Felix nods, settling in his arms. “That sounds fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that text screenshot of the "are you okay that i'm trans?" "are you okay that i'm a sagittarius?" lived rent free in my brain for months and so naturally i, a trans sagittarius, really wanted to include it here.


	4. Chapter 4

Dimitri is still awake.

Felix finds him hunched over the table in the Cardinals’ Room flipping through pages of notes and letters atop of discarded pieces on the strategy board. Felix knows he’s not really reading them. Dimitri’s eye glazes over every word as Felix draws closer. 

“What are you doing?” Felix asks, voice loud, in the hopes it startles Dimitri into alertness. “It’s three in the morning.” 

Dimitri hums, low and discontent, and flips to another page like he’s actually finished with the other one. It’s doubtful he’s reading any of these. But his response is, “I’m reading.” 

“Bullshit,” Felix says, crossing his arms. “Go to bed. You have to be well rested for the march on Enbarr.”

“I’m not tired.”

“So get in bed and stare at the ceiling for all I care. Enough of this. You’re not even reading it anyway.” Felix walks over until he’s right beside Dimitri, glancing over at the papers strewn across the table. “What is this?” He reaches over and picks one up when he catches sight of his name in familiar handwriting. His father’s.

“Letters.” Dimitri exhales — he looks exhausted, with heavy dark circles under his eye and a sadness in his voice. “From Rodrigue. I…” he pauses, swallows, and then continues. “I’m sorry, Felix.”

Felix stares at his name written in his father’s handwriting. It feels foreign to him, despite the countless letters his father sent him at school. This doesn’t feel real now his old man is gone. Finally, he asks, “For what?”

Dimitri pointedly averts Felix’s gaze. His lips have curled into a frown and he sits back in his chair. Felix knows him well enough; he can tell Dimitri’s trying to find the right words. Felix finds them for him.

“He wouldn’t want you blaming himself for his death.” When Dimitri looks up at him, Felix continues. “He died for you. So that you could become the king he always knew you’d become. Don’t let his death be in vain.” Felix pauses, his words hanging like a thick syrup between them. Finally he scoffs, placing the paper back on the desk. “I know you know this.” _You have to_ , he wants to say, but he keeps his mouth shut.

Dimitri says nothing. Felix grits his teeth. What a ridiculous scene — his father’s death happened before they marched to retake Fhirdiad, but Dimitri and Felix haven’t had a moment to talk about it yet. And here he is now trying to console someone over _his own father’s death_ like it isn’t supposed to be the other way around. Dimitri sighs pathetically. That’s the last straw. Felix angrily shoves everything — papers, notebooks, pens, even the ink jar — off the desk and onto the floor without even thinking. They clatter as they hit the stone tile, echoing off the walls. 

He grabs King Dimitri, his lord and leader of the Faerghus army, future king of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus, by the collar of his cape and forces him to stand. 

“What is the matter with you?” Felix growls at him, baring his teeth. “My father died for you. _For you!_ So you can continue into Enbarr and achieve your goals and dreams and be king of Faerghus and whatever else it is you need to do. You’re the face of the army, you’re the _leader_ of the army. People are looking to you for the strength and morale they need to march into fucking Enbarr and fight an Imperial Army probably twice our fucking size and not think about how they can die at any moment.” 

Felix’s voice rises as he speaks, until he’s at a full shout, knuckles turning white as they grip harder and harder into the fabric of Dimitri’s cape. 

“Don’t you get it?” He nearly shakes him. “My father wouldn’t have wanted you moping around over old letters. My father wouldn’t have wanted whatever this is that you’re doing. It’s time you figured that out.”

Dimitri stares back at him. Felix’s grip tightens around his cape. Dimitri opens his mouth, and then closes it. Felix takes that as recognition. 

“Your people fucking need you,” he says, and then grits his teeth to force out the one thing he wants to say, the one thing he’s been swallowing down all this time. Felix loosens his grip with one hand enough to slam a fist firmly against Dimitri's chestplate. “ _I_ need you.” 

Staring into his gaze like this, faces close, Felix knows he could kiss him right now.

He’s seen this story before. In books, when Ashe would ask him to read the latest novel about knights and love. In operas and plays, when Ingrid dragged him along so she wouldn’t have to go alone. In the idle gossip of their Garreg Mach days, when the worst of his problems was losing to Sylvain in a practice match in the training hall, when he’d tire himself out so badly he’d fall asleep after dinner and forget to do his homework, and the professor would lecture him about responsibility. The simpler days. Felix knows Dimitri remembers them. 

He’s seen the story of the standstill and the tension before the passion. If he was following a script, the kiss should come now, after frustration has ignited the flame inside of them and gives way for something else, something softer. And perhaps if it was any other situation with any other people right now, that _would_ be the way it goes. 

Instead, the moment Felix finds his resolve and sees it reflected in the shine of Dimitri’s eye, he lets go. He takes a step back. He takes a breath. And he waits. If he kissed Dimitri now, it would ruin the moment. Could ruin more than just the moment.

“Figure it out. I’m not after your empty words. Show me. Speak through your actions,” Felix says, looking away. “Go to bed. Sleep. Wake up in the morning and come back to us.” 

He moves to leave, turns his back and takes a step, and Dimitri begins to speak. 

“I will do the right thing,” he says, voice wavering. 

Felix pauses but doesn’t look back. “Prove it,” he says, before he resumes trying to leave the room.

“Felix,” Dimitri calls out after him, and that’s all it takes to stop Felix right in his tracks again. He looks over his shoulder. 

Dimitri steps over and gently grabs Felix by the wrist. “I said I’d follow my heart,” he says, “and I intend to do that.” When Felix says nothing, Dimitri continues, “I’ll sleep like you asked me to, but before I do, will you take a walk with me?” Felix scoffs. 

Garreg Mach is quiet at night. The moon is bright overhead, and it’s just the two of them walking slowly together. The flowers planted at the side of the walkways glow in the moonlight. They walk side by side, footsteps almost in tandem, and every now and then they’ll accidentally bump into each other as they walk. It’s been a while since they’ve taken a leisurely stroll — years, in fact. Felix can’t recall the last time it happened, so it must have been when they were children. 

“Thank you for talking to me, Felix.” Dimitri breaks the silence. “I needed to hear some of these things. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“I wasn’t worried,” Felix says. It’s a lie. Dimitri hasn’t escaped his mind ever since his stupid disappearing act from Fhirdiad. Dimitri is one of the only things he’s been able to think about.

“Of course,” Dimitri responds, softly. His arm bumps into Felix’s again. “Thank you anyway.” Another silence falls between them. Dimitri speaks first. “I suppose I simply wanted to thank you for not giving up on me.”

This earns another scoff from Felix. He’s running out of responses to this conversation, short of resorting to calling him an idiot. But Dimitri smiles, so against his better judgement, he says, “I never stopped looking for you. Ever since you escaped Cornelia the first time. I…” He trails off, and then corrects himself, “ _We_ never stopped looking for you.” 

“I know. Thank you.” Dimitri sucks in a deep breath, filling his lungs with the cool crisp air of the night. “I couldn’t have done any of this without you — without everyone and the professor.” 

Felix bristles at this and looks away. 

“That’s great,” he says dismissively. Dimitri stops walking. They’re by the gardens now, the moon bright overhead. Felix turns towards him. 

“Felix…” Dimitri says. “I want to talk to you about something. But I’m not quite sure how to begin.”

“Just say it.”

“Well,” Dimitri opens his mouth, eye darting around like he’ll find the answers in the stars or the dirt, written in the petal of a moonlit flower. Felix recognizes the motions because that’s exactly what he just did too. “I know it can be… hard, perhaps, to have me work with the professor all the time and I truly am incredibly thankful for their help, and I…” he trails off, awkwardly, and Felix is looking at him waiting to see the point. “I wanted to assure you that there is nothing between us, because… I….”

Felix cants a hip impatiently. “Why are you bringing this up? I didn’t even ask. Why does any of this matter to me?” 

“It’s always been you, Felix,” Dimitri says, finally, and after struggling with his words so much he’s given up on making them sound more romantic. “And I wanted to talk about this earlier, but I am unsure how much time we’ll have to talk once we reach Enbarr and I, well…”

“I get it,” Felix says, face feeling a little heated. “Ugh, you’re embarrassing.” He crosses his arms and looks away so Dimitri doesn’t see the blush on his face. 

“Am I being too forward?” Dimitri takes a half step forward, “I know there is never an opportune time for these things, I suppose, and I…” Dimitri trails off. He looks expectantly at Felix to say something, to scoff or yell at him, to call him foolish — Felix was never one for romance, for feelings. But instead Felix only huffs and looks up at Dimitri, holding his gaze. 

It’s nice, for a moment, to feel lost in the azure of Dimitri’s eye. To feel like despite everything, it’s still the two of them together as it’s always been. Dimitri takes his hand. 

“Felix,” he says, and he knows there is so much to be said and so little time to say it. “When this is all over, if the two of us return unscathed I’d… like to discuss our future together. Is that alright?”

Felix remembers what he thought this moment would be like, years ago when he and Dimitri were young and would play in the Blaiddyd gardens together. Felix once told Dimitri he wanted to be with him forever, to know that no matter what, they’d always be together. Dimitri had laughed then, as he always did, and Felix remembers loving his smile and the sound of his laugh as it hit his ears. Did he love him back then, too, when he thought about what it would be like to have Dimitri ask for his hand? To be asked to consider a future together? To be his one and only? When he was young, he wrote in a diary about how he wanted to marry Dimitri. But today…

Felix lets go of his hand. “You’ll be King when you return,” he says, staring right into Dimitri’s eye. “You’ll have a lot to think about. Don’t go making any rash decisions.” It’s meant to deter Dimitri into thinking straight, but the prince only smiles softly at him.

“Would you call this rash if I’ve had feelings for you ever since we were children?” His voice is soft, tender, and Felix has to look away.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” is his response. “We were kids.”

“We were children, and then we were teenagers, and then we were adults,” Dimitri continues. “Felix, at every moment, it’s always been you.”

Felix’s mind feels blank and heavy at the same time. 

“I…” he tries, and then trails off. There’s so much he wants to say, so much that’s been on his mind for years, and here he is with the perfect chance and none of the drive to say it. It’s strange, that they’ve known each other for so long and now the feelings they have — might have always had — are out in the open after all this time. Felix thought he’d have a larger, perhaps more heartfelt reaction to them. And yet… it’s as if the both of them knew this all along, and now that the words have been spoken, everything has just fallen into place. All the pieces where they should be.

“You don’t have to give me an answer now.” Dimitri saves him from an extremely confused response. “Only that you think about it. Until then…” It’s Dimitri’s turn to look bashful, a small blush tinting pink across his features. “Felix… may I kiss you?” 

Felix chokes back his surprise. “ _Kiss_ me?”

“Would that be alright?” 

“Tch.” Felix bites his lip, looks away again, and then tilts his head up towards Dimitri. “Yes.”

Dimitri hesitates for a moment, like he didn’t expect Felix to agree, and at the same time wasn’t sure how to even approach it if he did. He steps in close, holding his gaze, tenderly cupping the side of Felix’s face. Felix feels his brow unfurrow, like all the stress is leaving his body as he looks back up at Dimitri. Dimitri leans in.

Dimitri’s lips are surprisingly gentle despite being so chapped and dry. The kiss is nice. It’s almost _too_ nice. Like both of them want to just give in to what they’ve been wanting to do for years. Thinking back, Felix has wanted to kiss Dimitri ever since they were young, before they knew they had the world on their shoulders, before everything fell apart. But even still, they have each other. Felix is at Dimitri’s side, like he said he would be. His hands find the sides of Dimitri’s face and he holds him there, kissing him softly. But they pull away before it can be anything more. Not yet. 

“After Enbarr,” Dimitri whispers, taking one of Felix’s hands and planting a gentle kiss to the back of it. “I would like to talk about our future. Something to look forward to.”

Felix hums. Something to look forward to.

It’s the only thing Felix can think about on the march. How could he not, after Dimitri asked him such a promising request and kissed him under the moonlight? It was like a setup for a damn romance novel. 

It’s infuriating, really.

* * *

“Felix?” Dimitri peeks into the medical tent where Mercedes has just finished wrapping up Felix’s leg. She smiles when she sees Dimitri, and steps away to wash her hands and pack up her things. 

“Good afternoon, Dimitri. How is your shoulder?” Mercedes asks, tilting her head to look at Dimitri’s injury. 

“It’s… fine,” Dimitri replies, keeping his gaze on Felix. “I’m fine, thank you, Mercedes.” 

Mercedes glances over to Felix’s cot. “He’ll be fine,” she says, and turns to Felix. “Get some rest though, and try not to put too much weight on that leg.”

“It’s my leg.” Felix frowns. “I use it to walk.”

Mercedes doesn’t even acknowledge the response and smiles at Dimitri again. “I’ll leave you two alone for a bit.” She flashes another warning smile at Felix, and exits the tent. Dimitri walks over once she’s done, expression twisted in what seems to be worry and something else. 

“How are you?” he asks, and Felix lays back in the medical cot.

“Fine.”

“Really, Felix. I just want to make sure you’re okay.” Ah, so it’s guilt written on his face, then. Their army faced Edelgard in all her transformed glory, the husk of what was once his sister. Dimitri seemed so distracted — his movements were uncoordinated and his attention felt so distant and never on the right thing, and there were so many gods damn mages — Felix jumped in to take a blow aimed at Dimitri like a fool. Like all the past Fraldariuses had done. The fire magic seared right through the flesh of his leg. If it wasn’t for Mercedes’s quick thinking, he might have almost lost the limb entirely. 

Felix sighs and shifts. The motion reminds him of his injury and he keeps his expression carefully blank. “You were distracted.”

“I couldn’t… help but think about her the closer we approached.” Dimitri looks down, his hands are shaking. “What El thought she had to do to win. And then… she didn’t.” He pauses, takes a breath, and then begins again. “I watched her transformation break away, that monster she chose to become, disappear into nothingness around her. And it left behind… just a girl.” He takes another breath, just as shaky as his hands, and he shifts. “A girl willing to sacrifice everything for her cause.” 

Felix wants to interrupt, but he knows Dimitri wants to get this off his chest, and this may be his only time to do so. Felix bites his lip, brow furrowed, and when Dimitri stops talking, Felix finally says, “Don’t you dare feel guilty.”

“What else can I feel?” Dimitri’s voice is quiet, and breaks like he’s trying not to cry. “I put you in harm’s way, and you—”

Felix interrupts him as fast as lightning. “If you can’t handle watching me get hurt for you, then we—”

“But it _is_ my fault, Felix,” Dimitri interrupts. “If only I had been more careful— more vigilant, I would have seen it coming, I wouldn’t have stood within range—”

“Shut up, Dimitri,” Felix groans. His head hurts. “Shut up. I knew what I was getting into. You don’t need me to tell you that.”

“Felix, I—” 

“I chose to walk this path. I chose to be by your side.” Felix turns his head to look at him, features relaxing just enough to prove a point. “By your side no matter what that takes, or what that means.” And then he huffs, “Don’t make me have to spell it out for you.” 

Dimitri stares back.. Maybe Felix _does_ need to spell it out for him. 

Felix watches Dimitri part his lips like he’s on the edge of sharing his thoughts, but Felix reaches out and grabs him by the shirt and pulls him in for a kiss. Dimitri braces himself against the fabric cot and leans into it. He can smell the medical salve and the scent of washed sheets and soap. When they part, Felix exhales, breath mingling with Dimitri’s. 

Felix says no more. Dimitri understands.

By his side, no matter what that takes.

* * *

Felix has just finished inventorying his belongings when Dimitri catches him. Now that the war is over, he’s been slowly collecting his things out of Garreg Mach to move back to Fraldarius territory. Felix didn’t have a lot of things, even as a student years ago, so he’s taken liberties in the weapons hall. Plenty of things to grab now and train with when he’s home, and he suspects he’ll need the welcome distraction once he gets settled into his new position as Duke Fraldarius. 

“Can we talk?” Dimitri asks, as if the answer won’t be yes. Which Felix supposes is fair. Not too long ago, the answer absolutely could have been no. 

“What is it?” Felix responds as he loads another chest of miscellaneous weapons into his carriage. Sylvain had asked him if he really needed to bring so much back when he sifted through them earlier, to which he only shrugged. In retrospect, perhaps that was a valid question.

“Well, for one, do you really need so many… things?” Dimitri steps over a wrapped axe that Felix had momentarily discarded when he couldn’t figure out how to fit it inside the small carriage space. “Are these all weapons?” 

“They are,” Felix replies nonchalantly. “The war is over. I need something to do.” 

“Surely there are other…” Dimitri trails off when he sees Felix looks serious about this. He clears his throat. “Felix, I wanted to know if you’ve given what I asked you any thought.”

Felix sets down the chest he’s carrying and sighs. About a week ago, Dimitri approached him to ask him if he would consider being his right-hand advisor. It was a bold thing to ask, and Dimitri had asked him like he’d been talking about the weather. Felix didn’t have an answer then, too much on his mind considering his new role as Duke, and avoided the question entirely. 

“Dimitri,” Felix cleared his throat. “You have better things to think about.”

“I do have other things to think about,” Dimitri says, “but not better things. I can think of no better thing to talk about than perhaps our future together.”

“You keep saying ‘our future together’ like it means anything. What do you even mean by that?” 

Dimitri blinks, “I’m not sure what you mean? I’d like you by my side. The right hand of the king.” Dimitri looks awkward saying this, like he’s not sure what more to say. “Felix, I… you understand how I… feel about you. I was simply hoping you would stay with me.” 

“A very strange thing to ask someone who will not be your spouse.” Ah, the words are out there now…

“I… suppose. Felix, perhaps this is strange to say, but asking you this feels so… normal. Comfortable, even. I’m not afraid of facing the uncertain if I know you’re there to see it with me. And that is why I…” He trails off again. Neither of them are very good at this, it seems.

But he’s right, in a way. Felix feels the same way too. He’s loved Dimitri for so long it feels like a part of him. But is the thought of them together too… normal? Felix isn’t so sure he knows the answer to that anymore, after years of war, what is normal? Is that something Felix is even ready for, or wants?

He sighs. 

“I’ll be back for the coronation,” he says, and nothing else is said between them.

* * *

The coronation ceremony is nice. Bittersweet, but nice. 

Felix sits beside Sylvain and Ingrid at the celebratory banquet afterwards. King Dimitri Alexandre Blayddid is in the center of the room dancing with the professor, the Archbishop. He has a smile on his face that Felix hasn’t seen in years. Sylvain nudges Felix with a sly grin on his face and tells him to go dance with Dimitri. He declines. 

“I don’t dance,” he says.

“I will, then,” Ingrid says, getting up as the song ends and the professor steps away to grab a bite to eat. Felix watches Ingrid dance with Dimitri — they look happy. 

It’s good to see everyone happy.

Dimitri dances with everyone that night. He pulls Sylvain up from his seat to spin him about. He and Mercedes twirl around the dance floor together. He easily dips Annette and makes her laugh when she loses her balance and steps on his foot. Ashe shows off his newfound footwork with a traditional knight dance he’s learned for the celebration that Dimitri matches the steps of. Dedue’s dance with Dimitri is slow, so Dimitri can smile in his arms and share how much he appreciates him. By the end of Dimitri’s dancing, only Felix has not danced with his lord. 

That’s fine. Felix expected to keep it that way, but Dimitri is quick to cut him off when he gets up for another bite of food. Dimitri extends his hand. Felix doesn’t take it and turns away.

“Please Felix? Just one dance.” Dimitri smiles down at him, and Felix groans and looks away, but Dimitri knows that’s a yes. 

It’s uncomfortable with everyone watching them, and Felix’s gaze keeps darting around the room. Dimitri speaks like he’s trying to keep his attention. “Are you enjoying the night?”

“It’s fine,” Felix mumbles. He’s barely audible over the music. Dimitri tries to keep the conversation going, but it’s small talk and it doesn’t feel right. Finally, Felix sighs, lets Dimitri spin him, and when he returns back to his arms, he says, “I’ve thought about your offer.”

“Oh, we are talking about this now?” Dimitri tilts his head, but his smile doesn’t fade. “Now?”

“Ugh,” Felix grits his teeth, but he’s not actually angry. “When I was home, I… it was empty, without you.” The music slows, and their dance follows. Dimitri places a gentle hand on Felix’s middle back. “Like you were gone. I don’t want that. I’d rather figure it out… together. Whatever it takes.”

Dimitri leans in to kiss Felix’s forehead, and then rests his forehead against his. “I love you, Felix,” he says softly, just above the delicate lull of the music. Felix laces their fingers together. “I always have.”

“Idiot,” Felix responds, just as soft. But Dimitri can see the love in his half-lidded gaze, and if he didn’t know Felix would hate the eyes on him, he’d kiss him right here and now. 

And that’s fine. He and Felix have the rest of the night to celebrate together. 

* * *

Dimitri is jostled awake to the sound of cracking thunder booming in his ears. 

He slides up from under the blankets and runs a hand through his hair. Damp strands stick to the sides of his face. He reaches over for his phone on the nightstand. It’s 3:46 AM.

A dream?

He was dressed in such odd armor, such strange attire, and even stranger yet, he was in the middle of a war with someone who looked exactly like Felix standing by his side. 

The dream catches up with him. It was just a dream, just a dream. Thunder crashes so loud he feels it reverberate in his heart like a drum, like a pull, like a yearning for something he once had.

For someone he once knew. 


End file.
